Posted on 02/20/2009 4:47:26 AM PST by Lucky9teen
People say the problem with the budget is that they don’t understand what’s in it. Well of course they don’t. Look who’s explaining it to them — Arnold Schwarzenegger!
President Obama signed the stimulus bill in Denver, Colo. He picked Denver because our debt is now a mile high. It’s symbolic.
Terrible economy. Terrible. If you have any money left, do what I do: Invest in foreclosure signs.
Even Donald Trump has said he would like to reduce his debt. I say, How about reducing the size of that thing on your head?
Obama has addressed two of the three problems he said he would to avert a financial crisis . . . the first was to get the stimulus package passed, the second was the housing crisis, and the third is to get all of us to eat our pets.
Things are bad in California. Gov. Schwarzenegger has done everything he can to get fellow Republicans to back his plan because it involves a tax increase. He told them he’d be back; he’s said, “Hasta la vista, baby”; he even threatened to terminate them.
Reports say that President Obama is moving towards the Swedish models of banking. A president moving towards Swedish models? That hasn’t happened since the Clinton administration.
10. Exchange U.S. dollars for currency that's worth something
9. Win respect defeating Japan's top-ranked sumo wrestler
8. Shift world's perception of America from "hated" to "extremely disliked"
7. Personally thank all of her illegal campaign donors
6. Three words: stylish Indonesian pantsuits
5. Visit burial site of revered Chinese military leader, General Tso
4. Get drunk with that Japanese finance minister guy
3. Convince China to switch from lead-tainted products to mercury-tainted products
2. Catch Chinese screening of Benjamin Button entitled "The Strange Adventures of Freaky Grandpa Baby"
1. Pick up carton of duty-free smokes for Obama
Those were the days, eh? 1000+ post too :(
She thinks he’s going to somehow help her become site supervisor.
She said this to on of the drivers on their way out.
I about near laughed stuff out my nose when I heard this.
I’m sure if I’d been there, the two of us would be having a really good laugh!
She psychotically sees any female as competition to her efforts to continue to breed.
Why anyone would want to when she resembles an unholy fusion of Nancy Grace’s helmet hair on a very slightly thinner Rosie O..
*blech*
I’d really be a threat to her, then. BWAHAHAHAHA!
Could You Survive Another Great Depression?
You Are 60% Likely to Survive Another Great Depression
Even though you may not be expecting the worst, you’re the type of person who prepares for the worst.
You live a relatively modest life. You don’t overspend, and you aren’t very materialistic.
You are also quite self sufficient and independent. You have many useful skills.
You can take care of yourself and those you love... which is crucial to surviving another Great Depression.
Things will be different now and Internet surfing as you know it will be tracked by what the FBI calls a ‘nonintrusive method.’ The FBI says you will hardly notice anything different.
For a demonstration, click on the link below:
http://users.chartertn.net/tonytemplin/FBI_eyes/
Whew, I am in dire need of silliness this week and I missed you ping. I’m glad that FR has a search function!
Thanks for keeping us in good spirits.
An Irish woman of advanced age visited her physician to ask his advice in reviving her husband’s libido.
‘What about trying Viagra?’ asked the doctor.
‘Not a chance’, she said. ‘He won’t even take an aspirin.’
‘Not a problem,’ replied the doctor. ‘Give him an ‘Irish Viagra’. It’s when you drop the Viagra tablet into his coffee. He won’t even taste it. Give it a try and call me in a week to let me know how things went.’
It wasn’t a week later when she called the doctor, who directly inquired as to her progress. The poor dear exclaimed, ‘Oh, faith, bejaysus and begorrah! T’was horrid! Just terrible, doctor!’
‘Really? What happened?’ asked the doctor.
‘Well, I did as you advised and slipped it in his coffee and the effect was almost immediate. He jumped straight up, with a twinkle in his eye and with his pants a-bulging fiercely! With one swoop of his arm, he sent me cups and tablecloth flying, ripped me clothes to tatters and took me then and there passionately on the tabletop! It was a nightmare, I tell you, an absolute nightmare!’
‘Why so terrible?’ asked the doctor, ‘Do you mean the sex your husband provided wasn’t good?’
‘Feckin jaysus, ‘twas the best sex I’ve had in 25 years! But sure as I’ m sittin here, I’ll never be able to show me face in Starbucks again!’
She also, like her Obamesssiah, sees rules and requirements of the job as being optional and not applying to her.
I thought Irish Viagra was raw oysters and a pint of Guinness.
I must have worked with her before.
*blech*
People like her just rub me the wrong way, no matter what they do.
An entrepreneur in Australia is trying to put the “oh” in oysters with the ultimate aphrodisiac.
The calm waters of Brisbane Water make a perfect habitat to breed oysters and the area produces almost 10 million oysters every year.
But one farmer has come up with a new way to spice up his business.
Love cocktail: ‘Viagra-fed’ oysters
A couple of more stimulus packages and you’ll have lots of volunteers to sleep in the barn and help you man the perimeter.
I might give you a call if it gets a little too hot driving into Atlanta each day. Luckily, they just passed a law here that you can keep a firearm in your vehicle at work if you have a permit.
I have a coworker like that, except she’s not sweet by any means. She and another lib talk every day about “waiting on my check from Obama”. Should I tell them they are wasting their time? Nah! LOL
You are on the bus when you suddenly realize ... you need to fart.
The music is really loud, so you time your farts with the beat.
After a couple of songs, you start to feel better as you approach
your stop.
As you are leaving the bus, people are really staring you
down, and that’s when you remember........
.......................You’ve been listening to your ipod.
I asked one of the doe eyed young ladies in our office why she voted for Obama. her reply was that she really trusts him (no explanation why) and that Hillary seemed to have too much of an agenda.
I finally managed to ask her if she though maybe the president should have some sort of plan before he got to office.
Hey, I’m NOT blonde! ;-)
And, who cares about music.......
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