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Apologetic Mumbai Killers: "We Didn't Get the Memo About Obama"
IowaHawk ^ | 12/02/08 | Patrick1

Posted on 12/02/2008 2:31:53 PM PST by Patrick1

MUMBAI - Ajmal Amir Kasab, the sole surviving member of the 10-man team of Pakistani gunmen that left hundreds dead or wounded after a bloody three day rampage in Mumbai, today blamed the mayhem on an "email mixup" that left him and his colleagues unaware that Barack Obama had won election as President of the United States.

"What? Oh bloody hell, now you tell me," said Kasab, as he was led away in handcuffs by Indian security forces.

Kasab, 21, apologized to Indian President Pratibha Patil, explaining that no one in his group had known about the recent U.S. election results.

"Boy, talk about having egg on the face," said a visibly embarrassed Kasab. "If we knew Bush was on his way out, obviously we would have called off the crazy random baby-shootings and martyrdom stuff, and signed on with the Peace Corps or Habitat for Humanity. At this point I guess all I can say is 'my bad.'"

"Seriously, I can't even begin to tell you how shitty the whole situation makes me feel," he added dejectedly. "Don't get me wrong, I'm as thrilled as everybody else to find out Barack won the election, but this moment is always going to be bittersweet knowing that all those shootings were tragically unnecessary. Not to mention the six weeks I wasted in training camp."

(Excerpt) Read more at iowahawk.typepad.com ...


TOPICS: Humor
KEYWORDS: india; islam; jihad; messiah; mohammedanism; mohammedanism122008; mumbai; obama; wasteoftime

1 posted on 12/02/2008 2:31:54 PM PST by Patrick1
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To: Patrick1

lol


2 posted on 12/02/2008 2:33:52 PM PST by OneWingedShark (Q: Why am I here? A: To do Justly, to love mercy, and to walk humbly with my God.)
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Related....http://www.freerepublic.com/focus/f-news/2141517/posts


3 posted on 12/02/2008 2:33:55 PM PST by ButThreeLeftsDo (Read FR First.....THEN Read Drudge.)
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To: ButThreeLeftsDo

My bad.


4 posted on 12/02/2008 2:35:10 PM PST by Patrick1
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To: Patrick1

What’s he lookin’ for? A Mulligan?

Sheesh...just kill him.


5 posted on 12/02/2008 2:44:16 PM PST by PubliusMM (RKBA; a matter of fact, not opinion)
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To: Patrick1

Nobody does it better than Iowahawk!!


6 posted on 12/02/2008 2:44:25 PM PST by RDasher (El Nino is climate, La Nina is weather)
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To: PubliusMM

It’s satire.


7 posted on 12/02/2008 2:45:20 PM PST by Still Thinking (Quis custodiet ipsos custodes?)
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To: Vor Lady
After a reporter screened a YouTube video for him showing Obama's election night celebration, Qasim angrily summoned his intellegence department.

"Have any of you seen this? Any of you?" shouted Qasim, jabbing at the laptop screen with his hook, as his staff awkwardly stared at their sandals. "Because it would have been nice to know about it TWO ******* WEEKS AGO."

MMMmm, THAT'S GOOD SATIRE!!

8 posted on 12/02/2008 2:57:21 PM PST by LongElegantLegs (Deplore the profligate scattering of corpses!)
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To: Patrick1
The best satire is when it is believable.
This sounded like truth, thanks.
9 posted on 12/02/2008 2:58:06 PM PST by HuntsvilleTxVeteran (Obama, Change America will die for.)
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To: Patrick1

fake but accurate =)


10 posted on 12/02/2008 3:16:52 PM PST by Ancient Drive (will)
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To: Patrick1

Do they really ritually shave their testicles before martyrdom?

I was unaware that they let their BOYS keep those items.

I know the GIRLS have their clitoris’ ritually removed (on their kitchen tables..no need to stress them out with a visit to a sterile facility) ....hardly seems fair.


11 posted on 12/02/2008 3:23:43 PM PST by dianed
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To: Patrick1

Seriously, this is not funny.....


12 posted on 12/02/2008 6:22:25 PM PST by Guenevere
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To: Guenevere
You're right it's not funny It's hysterical!!!!
13 posted on 12/02/2008 10:20:02 PM PST by BruceysMom ("Where knowledge is folly...")
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