Thursday, we had to pick up a projo tv set from a customers house. It was in the FAR corner of the basement and the boss, Ray did NOT want to carry the set. he told the customer this , in a pretty hostile way. The two of them got to arguing pretty heavily and the customer mad a comment about how bad Ray's attitude was—and that in his younger days—he would have HIT ray for talking to him this way.
By now—with things spinning out of control, I suggested that we try and take in the TV anyway. I went out to the van to get the gloves,
(I will NOT carry a big screen up or down stairs without gloves on-a couple of months ago, my hand got VERY badly bruised and swollen, when Ray mashed my right hand into a staircase while I was carrying a projo set. I DID have on gloves(the CUSTOMER had let me use them) and had I NOT had the gloves on—I am SURE my hand would have been BROKEN!!)
Anyway, when I returned, instead of THANKING me for being willing to carry the set, He started JUMPING on ME—blaming ME for everything, saying I was not doing my job right, and such. I told him that if he didn't like my work, to get someone else(in the past this AlWAYS shut him up, but not THIS time. HE yelled loud and the customer was right at the top of the stairs, and I KNOW he heard all of it.
When we got to the van, it was obvious that he had only STARTED to attack me. He continued ranting and raving, saying I caused him more trouble than anyone he had ever worked with, that I was no good, not worth my pay and so on. By this time, I was so upset I told him to stop the van, and I got out and began walking. It was about 10 miles back to where my van was—but I did not CARE at that point.
He came up to me a few seconds later and asked me to get in and go back to the shop. But he was NOT done yet. He started making fun of me and saying that everything that happened to me in the past regarding failed jobs was MY fault and such. By now, I was nearly in tears and would talk NO MORE to him. we rode the 7 or more miles back to the shop from that point in silence.
When we got back, I told his wife, who really runs the shop and loves my work, what happened. She then tried to shut him up, as he was still ranting on. I then told him that he would NEVER humiliate me that way in front of a customer again, and that he did NOT realize how nasty he comes across to people. His daughter and wife then assured me that he did NOT even realize most of what he was saying, then made him stop and apologize to me. he did so, said he was sorry, and we shook hands. We all then left early, as all were stressed out. I was so stressed out that I just felt like “ getting in my van and driving around the country for about a week or more” besides that, some other stressful things have been happening in my life—and I was at the “breaking point .
Whether he accepts this fact or not, his behavior is driving people away from his business. Getting into a nasty argument with a customer was inexcusable. Turning the argument against an employee only makes him look worse. I wouldn't trust someone like that to work on anything of mine, and I'd be sure to tell my friends not to trust him.
Your problem is that you're in a bad place to have this conversation. I don't know the right answer. The book talks about telling him your feelings, but he clearly doesn't care about your feelings. I had a boss like that once, and I just left the company.