Mmmmmmm, that looks so good. My cold bowl of oatmeal seems to have lost its appeal.
I have decided that I am going to open an online business selling “carbon offsets.” For those worried about leaving a large carbon footprint, I am here to help you step lightly on the earth.
You can buy a credit for just $50. In return, I will plant a rosebush, fertilize and prune it for five years. I’ll send a certificate and periodic pictures of your carbon offset. I’ll also sell carbon offsets of pine trees, azaelas, rhododendrons, tea olives, magnolia grandiflora and other plants.
Not only will you reduce your carbon footprint but you will be helping to beautify a little corner of the earth.