For many, it's SPRING BREAK (or soon to be)...
Posted on 03/07/2008 4:50:15 AM PST by Lucky9teen
For many, it's SPRING BREAK (or soon to be)...
Spring break—that’s when kids work on their tans and teachers work on their sanity.
Spring break—that’s when kids go wild someplace other than school.
Spring break is when the only thing kids study is each other.
The college kids call it spring "break." Their parents, however, call it spring "broke."
Spring break is when teenagers give their swimsuits a dry run.
Spring break—that’s when students take time off from football games, basketball games, dances, parties, and hanging out in bars, and go to Florida and relax.
Thousands of college kids head south to vacation on a shoestring. Or at least that's what they wear on the beach.
Spring break is that annual ritual when college kids flock to the beach, get drunk, and try to swim upstream.
Spring break is when the nation's college kids demonstrate to the world how much they've learned.
Spring break is when the nation's breweries go all out to teach another generation how to throw up responsibly.
Golf Balls ...
A man entered the bus with both of his front pockets full of golf balls
and sat down next to a beautiful (you guessed it) blonde. The puzzled
blonde kept looking at him and his bulging pockets.
Finally, after many such glances from her, he said, “Its golf balls”.
Nevertheless, the blonde continued to look at him for a very long time,
deeply thinking about what he had said.
After several minutes, not being
able to contain her curiosity any longer, she asked;
“Does it hurt as much as tennis elbow?”
“A southern fairytale begins, ÂYÂall ainÂt gonna believe this sh**.Â
What, that’s not how they all start?
This’ns a little racy, but here goes:
The happy groom-to-be
I was a very happy man. My wonderful girlfriend and I had been dating for over a year, and so we decided to get married. There was only one little thing bothering me...It was her beautiful younger sister.
My prospective sister-in-law was twenty-two, wore very tight miniskirts, and generally was bra-less. She would regularly bend down when she was near me, and I always got more than a nice view. It had to be deliberate. Because she never did it when she was
near anyone else.
One day her “little” sister called and asked me to come over to check the wedding invitations. She was alone when I arrived, and she whispered to me that she had feelings and desires for me that she couldn’t overcome. She told me that she wanted me just once before I got married and committed my life to her sister.
Well, I was in total shock, and couldn’t say a word. She said, “I’m going upstairs to my bedroom, and if you want one last wild fling, just come up and get me.”
I was stunned and frozen in shock as I watched her go up the stairs. I stood there for a moment, then turned and made a beeline straight to the front door. I opened the door, and headed straight towards my car.
To my surprise, my entire future family was standing outside, all clapping! With tears in his eyes, my father-in-law hugged me and said, “We are very happy that you have passed our little test. We couldn’t ask for a better man for our daughter. Welcome to the family.”
And the moral of this story is:
Always keep your condoms in your car.
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