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****THE OFFICIAL FRIDAY SILLINESS THREAD****
www.funnysign.com ^

Posted on 10/05/2007 7:14:47 AM PDT by Lucky9teen

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1 posted on 10/05/2007 7:14:49 AM PDT by Lucky9teen
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To: 2111USMC; 21stCenturion; 2ndDivisionVet; 3AngelaD; 4mycountry; 5Madman2; 66-442hot; ...

Official Friday Silliness Thread



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2 posted on 10/05/2007 7:16:18 AM PDT by Lucky9teen (This country feels the same when Congress is in session as when a baby gets hold of a hammer.)
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To: Lucky9teen

3 posted on 10/05/2007 7:17:22 AM PDT by PBRSTREETGANG
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To: PBRSTREETGANG

From here.

4 posted on 10/05/2007 7:18:57 AM PDT by BibChr ("...behold, they have rejected the word of the LORD, so what wisdom is in them?" [Jer. 8:9])
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To: Lucky9teen

HAPPY FRIDAY ALL!


5 posted on 10/05/2007 7:19:26 AM PDT by mrs. a (It's a short life but a merry one...)
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To: Lucky9teen

6 posted on 10/05/2007 7:20:24 AM PDT by PBRSTREETGANG
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To: Lucky9teen

bump


7 posted on 10/05/2007 7:21:10 AM PDT by Deaf Smith
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To: Lucky9teen

CRAIGSLIST POSTING (AND ANSWER):

What am I doing wrong?

Okay, I’m tired of beating around the bush. I’m a beautiful
(spectacularly beautiful) 25 year old girl. I’m articulate and classy.
I’m not from New York . I’m looking to get married to a guy who makes at
least half a million a year. I know how that sounds, but keep in mind
that a million a year is middle class in New York City , so I don’t
think I’m overreaching at all.

Are there any guys who make 500K or more on this board? Any wives? Could
you send me some tips? I dated a business man who makes average around
200 - 250. But that’s where I seem to hit a roadblock. 250,000 won’t get
me to central park west. I know a woman in my yoga class who was married
to an investment banker and lives in Tribeca, and she’s not as pretty as
I am, nor is she a great genius. So what is she doing right? How do I
get to her level?

Here are my questions specifically:

- Where do you single rich men hang out? Give me specifics- bars,
restaurants, gyms

-What are you looking for in a mate? Be honest guys, you won’t hurt my
feelings

-Is there an age range I should be targeting (I’m 25)?

- Why are some of the women living lavish lifestyles on the upper east
side so plain? I’ve seen really ‘plain jane’ boring types who have
nothing to offer married to incredibly wealthy guys. I’ve seen drop dead
gorgeous girls in singles bars in the east village. What’s the story
there?

- Jobs I should look out for? Everyone knows - lawyer, investment
banker, doctor. How much do those guys really make? And where do they
hang out? Where do the hedge fund guys hang out?

- How you decide marriage vs. just a girlfriend? I am looking for
MARRIAGE ONLY

Please hold your insults - I’m putting myself out there in an honest
way. Most beautiful women are superficial; at least I’m being up front
about it. I wouldn’t be searching for these kind of guys if I wasn’t
able to match them - in looks, culture, sophistication, and keeping a
nice home and hearth.

* it’s NOT ok to contact this poster with
services or
other commercial interests

++++

THE ANSWER

I read your posting with great interest and have thought meaningfully
about your dilemma. I offer the following analysis of your predicament.
Firstly, I’m not wasting your time, I qualify as a guy who fits your
bill; that is I make more than $500K per year. That said here’s how I
see it.

Your offer, from the prospective of a guy like me, is plain and simple a
crappy business deal. Here’s why. Cutting through all the B.S., what you
suggest is a simple trade: you bring your looks to the party and I bring
my money. Fine, simple. But here’s the rub, your looks will fade and my
money will likely continue into perpetuity...in fact, it is very likely
that my income increases but it is an absolute certainty that you won’t
be getting any more beautiful!

So, in economic terms you are a depreciating asset and I am an earning
asset. Not only are you a depreciating asset, your depreciation
accelerates! Let me explain, you’re 25 now and will likely stay pretty
hot for the next 5 years, but less so each year. Then the fade begins in
earnest. By 35 stick a fork in you!

So in Wall Street terms, we would call you a trading position, not a buy
and hold...hence the rub...marriage. It doesn’t make good business sense
to “buy you” (which is what you’re asking) so I’d rather lease. In case
you think I’m being cruel, I would say the following. If my money were
to go away, so would you, so when your beauty fades I need an out. It’s
as simple as that. So a deal that makes sense is dating, not marriage.

Separately, I was taught early in my career about efficient markets. So,
I wonder why a girl as “articulate, classy and spectacularly beautiful”
as you has been unable to find your sugar daddy. I find it hard to
believe that if you are as gorgeous as you say you are that the $500K
hasn’t found you, if not only for a tryout.

By the way, you could always find a way to make your own money and then
we wouldn’t need to have this difficult conversation.

With all that said, I must say you’re going about it the right way.
Classic “pump and dump.”

I hope this is helpful, and if you want to enter into some sort of
lease, let me know.


8 posted on 10/05/2007 7:21:24 AM PDT by Sax
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To: Lucky9teen

Yea!!!


9 posted on 10/05/2007 7:23:53 AM PDT by ShadowAce (Linux -- The Ultimate Windows Service Pack)
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To: Lucky9teen
Image and video hosting by TinyPic Image and video hosting by TinyPic Image and video hosting by TinyPic
10 posted on 10/05/2007 7:25:15 AM PDT by 007girl ("If you're gonna go out, go out fighting." Stoney Lebby-Maddox/11 years old)
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To: Lucky9teen
In light of current events:

Image and video hosting by TinyPic
11 posted on 10/05/2007 7:27:59 AM PDT by pillut48 (CJ in TX --Soccer Mom and proud RUSH REPUBLICAN! WIN, FRED, WIN!!!)
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To: Lucky9teen

Two men were driving through West Virginia when they got pulled over by a State Trooper. The cop walked up and tapped on the window with his nightstick. The driver rolled down the window and WHACK, the cop smacked him in the head with his nightstick.

“What the hell was that for?” the driver asked.

“You’re in West Virginia, son,” the trooper answered. “When we pull you over in West Virginia, you better have your license ready by the time we get to your car.”

“I’m sorry, officer,” the driver said, “I’m not from around here.”

The trooper runs a check on the guy’s license—he’s clean and gives the guy his license back.

The trooper then walks around to the passenger side and taps on the window. The passenger rolls down the window and “WHACK”, the trooper smacks him on the head with the nightstick.

“What’d you do that for?” the passenger demands.

“Just making your wish come true,” replied the trooper.

“Making WHAT wish come true?” the passenger asked.

“Because I know your type.” the trooper says, “Two miles down the road you’re gonna turn to your buddy and say,”I wish that asshole would’ve tried that shit with me”.


12 posted on 10/05/2007 7:34:31 AM PDT by Sonora
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To: Lucky9teen
the jury at the Michael Vick trial...
13 posted on 10/05/2007 7:35:00 AM PDT by fredhead (What this world needs is a few more Rednecks - Charlie Daniels)
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To: Lucky9teen
Photo Sharing and Video Hosting at Photobucket
14 posted on 10/05/2007 7:36:29 AM PDT by backinthefold (yeesh)
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Photo Sharing and Video Hosting at Photobucket
15 posted on 10/05/2007 7:41:11 AM PDT by backinthefold (yeesh)
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To: Lucky9teen
This is a different kind of sign: A sign that we have really reached the abyss
16 posted on 10/05/2007 7:41:27 AM PDT by oldtimer2 (There’s been a lot of high-minded gasbaggery going on.)
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To: Lucky9teen

17 posted on 10/05/2007 7:41:32 AM PDT by SmithL (I don't do Barf Alerts, you're old enough to read and decide for yourself)
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To: Lucky9teen

My SIL works for this village. I had a great laugh when I saw this sign.

18 posted on 10/05/2007 7:43:05 AM PDT by nuke rocketeer
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Photo Sharing and Video Hosting at Photobucket
19 posted on 10/05/2007 7:43:11 AM PDT by backinthefold (yeesh)
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To: Lucky9teen

top 20!


20 posted on 10/05/2007 7:43:22 AM PDT by absolootezer0 (stop repeat offenders- don't re-elect them!)
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