I must say though when mum was taken in for the last time even though there was nothing they could do for her she was immediately seen and put into the resuse area.
It was a Saturday but they quickly did tests and got results from the lab which confirmed that due to her frail condition there was not point in doing any more aggressive treatment.
If they had put her on life support her lungs would never have been strong enough to come off it and with her Alzheimer's as developed as it was it was kinder to just put fluids in her but let her go peacefully, which she did about 10 hours later. She was so dehydrated that they had to put the fluid in very slowly as otherwise it would have sent the body into total shock and she would probably have died of a heart attack or something similar.
They were great the only time I would say when the NHS does do what it should is when there is a real emergency and they acted quickly and kept me informed all the time. I was allowed to ring the ward every hour during the night and they rang me near the end. I did not get there in time but I believe that was providential as really I do not know how I would have coped with seeing her passing, I saw her just after and she was finally at peace. It was a strange way to begin Christmas Day but I can say in a way it was the best Chritsmas present I could have been given she was at long last at peace.
I know little about the NHS (mostly the bad-mouthing they get from us conservatives here in the US) but it sounds like they did what they could. When there's no alternative but to let go of a loved one, then all you can ask is that they may leave in peace.
My own wife was able to do so, and in her own bed. I was there, as was one of her daughters. The other five daughters were called, and came immediately, to spend a little time with her before we called the mortician.
As far as NOT going in to the ER? Oh brother. The worst of it is the wait. Last time it was SEVEN hours sitting in a hard chair (and with a fractured hip that ain't no picnic, let me tell you), listening to all the screaming, crying children ... imagining the germs that are being spread all over the place that I DON'T need to be picking up ... LOL ... the staff are wonderful. The nurses, the doctors, they are so very good. I have no complaints there. BUT the hours and hours of waiting and then when you do get a bed? More hours and hours of waiting to get the tests arranged, etc. etc. and with my hip? I needed the air mattress. The doctor ordered it. It never came. So, by the time I got out of there, I felt as if I'd been run over by the Hogwarts Express. I won't do it again. Not this little kitty. Thank you for understanding!