A brightly coloured bib on your landlord? Would it say "twit" on the front? Kind of like belling a cat? There's an idea. Instead of a ridiculous bib that looks unsafe, how about the old idea of bells? They worked for a hundred years. Seems people have forgotten good ideas that are "proven".
Now that does paint an interesting mental picture... If I had a photo of him I'm sure a trip through PaintShopPro could produce the desired wearing apparel... But I have neither a picture of him or the time tonight to do that... Thanks for the chuckle!
By the way, are you a Brit by any chance? (coloured, eh?)
At least you're not French, or you would have said 'I surrender'...