Welcome to the United States of Grand Fenwick (Vanity)

Vanity | February 7, 2007 | 1-Eagle

[1-Eagle]

Welcome to the United States of Grand Fenwick

This Guide is carefully prepared for new arrivals who may find our ways a bit confusing.

Above, please note our Grand Symbol of the USGF, which is fashioned after the real bird itself: the proud (and unfortunately common) two-headed eagle. In the wilds, this bird can often be found in the hedges, traving sideways, ever dodging from one side to the next. As our national symbol, this Grand Fenwick bird is always wise, for it is never proven wrong.. having either truth in one beak, or the other at all times.

Here in the land of "Aye" and "Nay" we are for things, whilst being against them at the same time.
Thus, we are for a fence on our southern border, but we want for it to be invisible.
We always vote for a war, and then we vote against it.
We say to our Generals: "Aye" and to the Generals plan for victory we say: "Nay"

This concept may be a different way to the rest of the world, but this is the policy of The United States of Grand Fenwick,
at least until we vote that it is not, which may be tomorrow, so please pay attention.

[1-Eagle]

Please feel free, citizens of the land of "Aye" and "Nay" to proffer your bits of wisdom for the guide so visitors will understand our ways here.

Thanks, and hope it was worth a chuckle.

[1-Eagle]

(From the book itself:)

1. Yes can be turned to no, and no can be turned to yes if sufficient words are applied to any subject!
2. The victor is always right!
3. The pen may indeed be mightier than the sword, but the sword will sing louder at any given moment!

[drjimmy]

I'll open a bottle of my finest Pinot Grand Fenwick to serve our visitors.

[1-Eagle]

[1-Eagle]

How noble, sir. Thanks.

[1-Eagle]

Here is yet another fine rendering of our noble mascot: