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"No, they aren't"

Yes they are.
About the only really "different" slam is the clay at the French, where Federer is regularly taken out.
The rest are not that much different in terms of playing.

"In addition to the clay court surface at the French Open, Wimbledon is played on grass. "

In general those who do well in the men's circuit at the US Open do well at Wimbledon as well.
You only have to look at Andy Roddick.
Clay is different, yes, but that is exactly where Federer (and Andy) keep failing.

"Women's tennis isn't subject to the same variations between surfaces as men's tennis -- mainly because women can't dominate the game on some surfaces with 135+ MPH serves like men can."

Rubbish!
WTF you talking about?
Women play on exactly the same surfaces as the men at the slams, on exactly the same courts, on exactly the same 14 days.

"I'd also make the case that Serena Williams has been so hopped-up on steroids over the years that she's basically a man playing in the womens' bracket anyway."

Groan!
The last desperate resort of a Canadian bigot is to resort to racist smears and innuendo.
Please, share this with us will ya?: Exactly when did Serena test positive for any drugs?
While you are about it, perhaps you will prove that there are no steroids used in the men's tennis circuit as well.

The last desperate resort of any poster is to call an American a Canadian.

There's no question that womens' tennis and mens' tennis are two different games. Count up the number of aces in any given match -- particularly on a fast surface like grass. A male player with nothing more to his name than a strong, booming serve can run deep into the tournament at Wimbledon simply by cranking out 40-50 aces when he's on serve (Goran Ivanisevic won Wimbledon a couple of years ago as an unseeded has-been by serving a record 213 aces).

A "first serve" from a male player like Andy Roddick can exceed 150 miles per hour. A female player with a "strong, booming serve," on the other hand, would be hard-pressed to reach 125 mph on her serve.

This stark difference between men and women explains why it's so difficult for male players to dominate all four Grand Slam tournaments.