Posted on 01/22/2007 10:51:57 AM PST by MotleyGirl70
Meet Elly Kulesza, Terror Toddler.
In her finer moments—mainly when she’s on land — 3-year-old Elly is an adorable and sweet-mannered child, a blue-eyed charmer who likes to dance and harbors a particular fondness for Thomas the Tank Engine.
“She’s a typical 3-year-old,” said her mother, Julie Kulesza of 7 Primrose St. in Worcester. “She has her moments like all 3-year-olds, but she’s not like one of those ‘Nanny 911’ children you see on TV.”
Elly’s dad, Gerald Kulesza, is a full-time EMT in Boston who also attends nursing school full time, and he did so well last semester that Elly’s mom surprised her husband with a trip to Florida to visit his parents, who live in Bonita Springs. So on Jan. 11, the family flew from Logan Airport to Fort Meyers on AirTran Airways, and even though it was Elly’s first plane trip she behaved like a dream and spent most of the flight coloring in her coloring book and watching movies on a portable DVD player.
“She was great,” her mom remembered. “When we made our descent into Florida we could see the water and she shouted, ‘Look, mommy, there’s the beach where we go swimming,’ and everyone laughed.”
Yes, it was a heartwarming moment for all concerned, and the trip was great, too. The family swam and went sightseeing, and on Jan 14 they drove back to the airport for the return trip home. They checked their luggage — a suitcase and a car seat. As they waited for their flight to be called, Elly contentedly munched on a bag of Cheetos and watched out the window as the planes took off and landed.
Then came … The Boarding. Suddenly and without warning, angelic little Elly morphed into every parents’ nightmare.
Her mom thinks it may have been because of the ear surgery Elly underwent earlier this month, and perhaps her memory of the discomfort and ear pressure she endured during the plane’s descent into Florida. For whatever reason, when they got on the plane, Elly started to cry and wouldn’t stop. Nor would she sit down — she plopped herself down on the floor in front of her seat and proceeded to throw a temper tantrum.
“I was trying to console her and the stewardess came over and said, ‘Did you buy that seat for her?’ remembers Ms. Kulesza, 31, who is four months pregnant. “I said yes, and she told me my daughter needs to sit in it. I told her I was trying.”
Moments later, an AirTran Airways employee armed with a walkie-talkie addressed Mr. Kulesza.
“Sir, you need to get her under control,” she said.
“We’re trying,” Mr. Kulesza noted.
The passengers, meanwhile, were quite understanding and one of them offered the toddler a lollipop, which she rejected. Then the walkie-talkie woman returned to the Kuleszas’ aisle and displayed the raw tact and diplomacy of Donald Trump.
“Sir, you need to get off the plane,” she announced.
“What?” a stunned Mr. Kulesza asked. “Are you serious?”
“Sir, you need to get off the plane now.”
They got off the plane, while their luggage and car seat flew on to Boston. In the terminal they were directed to an AirTran supervisor, who told the couple that the stewardess was uncomfortable “because you have an unruly child who struck a woman on board.”
Mr. Kulesza was incredulous. “That was her mother,” he explained. “She hit her on the arm. Lady, this is a 3-year-old child we’re talking about.”
“Sir, we don’t differentiate between 3 and 33,” the AirTran supervisor replied. Mr. Kulesza said the woman proceeded to lecture him about child discipline, and how she would never tolerate her children behaving in such a manner, at which point Mr. Kulesza said, “You really need to stop talking now.”
The couple were also told that, since they had been ejected from the plane, they were banned from flying with AirTran for 24 hours. So they were forced to return to Bonita Springs for the night, and Mr. Kulesza missed a 16-hour work shift, and the next day they returned to the airport and can surely be forgiven if they fed their daughter enough Children’s Benadryl to fell a stallion. I exaggerate, perhaps, but it’s certainly what I would have done. In any case, Elly slept through the return flight home.
The incident has sparked varied responses from those who heard the story. While many people — mostly parents — sympathize with the Kuleszas, others are less inclined. For example, when I related the tale to an unnamed colleague and asked if he had ever heard of an airline bouncing a child from a flight he said, “No, but I’m all for it. Couldn’t they have checked her with the baggage?”
This colleague, as it happens, has no kids.
AirTran, meanwhile, has apparently had a change of heart. After the airline received a phone call Thursday from yours truly, an AirTran customer service rep called the Kuleszas, apologized profusely for the incident and refunded them the $595 cost of their tickets.
“We do believe the situation could have been handled differently,” said AirTran spokeswoman Judy Graham-Weaver. “We will use this case as a means to train our agents on dealing with this type of situation on our flights … While there are FAA regulations that mandate all passengers have to be securely fastened in their seat belts before a plane can depart, we need to work with our customers in situations like this to help them — and that is what we will focus on.”
Ms. Kulesza is appreciative of the response, but believes she could have calmed her daughter down, if given the chance.
“It wasn’t like she had a bomb strapped to her waist,” she noted.
AirTran also extended another offer to the Kuleszas — free airline tickets to the destination of their choosing. The offer has been declined.
“I said I appreciated it, but I told them not to bother,” Ms. Kulesza said. “We won’t ever be flying with that airline again.”
>>>I'm waaaay over the "Now, we need to settle down and let's think about it" tripe that passes for parenting these days.<<<
I'm with you. A good smack on the rearend never hurt any kid.
How did modern parenting get so lousy, anyway?
I think Motley girl70 summed it up with ... I'm amazed that the rotten behavior of some children won't even faze some parents one bit.
Actually, Xena, a stiff yank of the hair behind my son's ear usually cures most of his "problems."
I never allowed my son to have a throw-down, red faced, wall-eyed canyption fit, without suffering the consequences. He had very few of those.
But he did have some, and they were unpleasant, and I still feel sorry for any other mom and dad going through it.
It's Bush's fault.
I just tried it on my own hair, and I bet that DOES work. Yow!
Yeah..just look at his twins!
I do, as often as I can.
That's what we used to get from our mom in church.
That's called "yanking a knot in your head." haha
I have a friend who calmly pinches the crap out of her son's arm on the back just above the elbow when he is acting up in public. She keeps a smile on her face and lets him know there is more waiting for him at home if he doesn't behave and nobody sees what is going on. HEr son usually straightens right up.
We fly Southwest alot so we get free tickets and those free drink coupons. We always take books of those with us, in case our 20 month-old decides to be screechy. Once, we had some young guys sit behind us and they were swearing and vulgar and just sleazy-nasty. They were not loud. We had our 8year-old with us at the time. I asked them to please realize there was a kid in front of them who can hear that language, and I gave them each a book of drink coupons. They apologized and they were fantastic and well-behaved the rest of the flight. I've given out those books when I get the looks from people that I can see are irritated with our noise. It doesn't happen often. Usually, when I apologize for the noise, the people who were giving out dirty looks tend to change their demeanor and say, well, we know you can't help it, etc. Now, it's only happened a couple times and nothing that lasted more than 5 minutes (although it seems like forever when the child is screaming). I am wondering, about this little girl. It must not have been the screaming so much as the actual behavior that got the flight attendant's attention. We've never had that problem. We are much bigger than all our children and they can scream all they want, they are going in the seat. It's hard as a parent to know the screeches are annoying other passengers. That's why we try to line up interventions ahead of time - a whole bag of tricks to offset any loudness. We hardly ever get to use them, thankfully. We fly just about every month, round trip, Austin to Chicago and back. We've seen those kids that are wild. My heart goes out to the parents and to the rest of us having to deal with it. It's very stressful for everyone.
Me too.
Actually, it's only happened once or twice to me. But on one occasion, the morbidly obese passenger was taking his seat and most of mine.
The sad part is how apologetic he was about it.
This happened to my husband and he had to sit next to her, and she started this before the plane left, in other words, she got on board sick.
He had to sit there and endure it.
We considered burning his clothes.....who knew what was wrong this this passenger?
It was horrible.
For that matter, adults on a plane have any number of options to counter a screaming child...
..earphones, earplugs, watch the movie, read a book...
..the parent is the one who has to contend with the child.
But there is no recourse if someone next to you is continuously throwing up and the steardess says 'sorry'....and you are a captive during the entire flight!
Sure--it's always someone else's kid with the rotten behavior--never your own little darling.
I think my favorite fix to a screaming toddler was my uncle (a harley riding, leather wearing patriot) who saw a kid screaming in a grocery cart. When he walked past (the kid was having a full-out meltdown) he slapped the kid on the back of the head without the mom noticing (just enough to get his attention)... My uncle walked down the next aisle as the kid and mom walked up and as soon as that kid saw my uncle walking toward him he shut right up. worked like a charm
Thank goodness! It is beyond time for stores, restaurants, etc., to remove unruly kids and their oblivious parents when the parents refuse to take action. There are some places I just won't go to anymore because they are run by wild children and it gives me a headache to deal with it. Seen the kids wearing skate shoes? Those are the worst.
One Word - Robitussin
Children 3 and over must be in a seat at push-back that is the LAW. This flight had already been delayed 15 minutes. There were 112 people on board. The parents refused to pick-up there child and put her in a seat and put the seat belt around her. Do you people really think that 112 people should have been delayed because of this one screaming child. She needed to be removed from the plane and she was...it is just that simple.
THANK YOU AirTran. Not everybody thinks Elly is the angel her parents do. One report stated she was sceaming and hitting them and refused to take her seat. She's 3...PUT her in her seat.
Yes, I don't blame the 3 year old for being a spoiled brat. It's her parents who need a smack across the chops.
People have less than an hour to make connections and weather often erodes that cushion. The parents had 30 minutes to board the plane and the news stories indicate that the pilot had held the plane for an additional 15 minutes beyond departure time.
Actually, I blame the mother. The husband appears to be working his behind off to support his family. The mother on the other hand appears to be one of those princesses who thinks that --in exchange for mediocre and probably infrequent sexual services -- she is entitled to a life time meal ticket.
Her only job seems to be raising the kid and she couldn't even make the brat take its seat -- choosing instead to put the travel of 100+ other passengers at risk and then whine to the news media that she wasn't given more time. How can you blame the 3 year old for its public tantrum -- obviously the acorn does not fall far from the tree.
My parents constantly entertained guests for my father's bank up and down the state of California, so from the time I was born I went with them and was expected to behave at all times. I can recall one time when my parents were meeting with a maitre-d getting a menu together and I apparently got bored and started to get down out of my seat and climb around.
Dad warned me once.
When I didn't listen, he swiftly picked me up and took me to the door of the restaurant and sat me in a chair and told me to stay put. You didn't ignore my father and survive, trust me. For another hour and a half, I didn't budge an inch.
My children at age 5 and 3 can already be taken anywhere. They obey the first time they are asked to. We have never had bedtime arguments and they say "Yes Ma'am" and "Yes sir" automatically.....not to say that they don't have their moments. But from the moment they were born they knew what was expected of them and they rise to the level that is expected. Children have a funny way of doing that.
There are always exceptions to that -- when they are sick, off schedule, no nap, etc....-- then you do not subject them to situations in which they are expected to behave like angels and you certainly do not subject others to the consequences of their misbehavior. You learn as a parent to leave a restaurant or a gathering or whatever....because it is the decent thing to do....you do not subject others to whatever problem your children are having.
Sounds to me like a lot of parents do not understand that there are, frankly, times when children can be inconvenient -- they get sick....they get off schedule or out of sorts or they miss a nap....and rather than forcing the situation, you just leave and take care of the problem at home. There will always be another time to go to the restaurant or another gathering or whatever.
My boys behave well because I am conscious of whatever may be going wrong and I adjust....and because they have quickly learned that there is no alternative for them but to behave. We are going to have a baby in March -- a girl -- and she will also be expected to behave as well. The boys are already practicing telling her our catch-phrase..."First time obey..."
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