Posted on 12/22/2006 4:11:03 AM PST by King of Florida
HOLTSVILLE, N.Y., Dec. 19 On a recent quiet afternoon, with few witnesses around, Homer Simpson, Santa Claus and a penguin perched on an igloo suddenly appeared here on the Long Island landscape as if from nowhere, unfolding slowly like Frankenstein monsters lurching to life on the table. As Homers extremities reached full size, his pink nylon fist puffed into Mr. Snow Mans face an involuntary attack, to be sure. Bop.
Such is the phantasmagoric, Disney-esque experience of the new Christmas custom sweeping the suburbs.
Whatever else Christmas in America means the birth of Jesus, holly wreaths, the Chipmunks, cultural tension it now also includes these gargantuan, inflatable outdoor decorations, called Airblowns by their chief manufacturer.
They have been around for a while, but mark 2006 as the year these decorations became a full-blown fixture in the pantheon of holiday traditions and, as is the holiday tradition, the subject of a rift.
Not quite a culture war. Call it an intramural disagreement among the Christmas crazed.
Appalling, Catherine Bruckner, a traditionalist who decorates only in holly and evergreen, sneered as she stopped her car in front of an inflated Santa playing poker with two shrewd-eyed reindeer in a menagerie totaling two dozen figures. Its bad enough to see those things on Halloween. At Christmas, they rise to a level of tackiness that is horrible.
(Excerpt) Read more at nytimes.com ...
That one does look like a murder scene.
I'm amazed, with the big wind storm we just had, that all those things didn't end up somewhere in the next state, but there they were, cheerfully waving in the aftermath! I think folk must have pulled them in for the storm and had already put them back out, but I can't say I know for sure.
The kids in this guy's neighborhood must be depressed this time of year.
A secret desire that I have.
The big blow-up doll around these parts this year is Santa on a motorcycle wear shades.
Yikes. Claymore?
Oh I like that .. thanks for the idea
Had to come up with something when they learned that our chimney only led to the fiery furnace. Hahahaha
I love white lights - especially the very small ones. It looks like stars cover the house!
A home a couple blocks away from us has all blue and green lights. It looks like they're trying to signal the UFO where to land.
I also gotta say I hate the inflatables. They're weird and noisy and not Christmassy.
There's a mall we shop in that has something similar to this thing here. I always tell my wife, that darn-it, she's gotta remind me to bring the camera next time so she can take a picture of me 'behind' the horse, who's wearing an even more pained expression than this one.
The pay off is the disgusted tsk-tsk look that I get, everytime.
See more at Christmas Lights 2006, I blog about them at Deck the halls and gutters and trees etc.
I like that idea! Particularly the "special" key!
That guy needs to spend a lot less on inflatables and a lot more on lawn maintenance. And is that a Festivus pole I see? I thought they were supposed to be unadorned.
That may explain the carnage. Festivus has it's "Feats of Strength" contest right after midnight.
One of our neighbors has the old-fashioned colored bulb lights on his place -- my wife says his place looks like a 70s disco.
There's a joke about "Airing of Grievances" and inflatables in there somewhere.
Have you ever seen the "funny tourist photos" that have been emailed around from time to time? There are several that are similar to what you just described.
Go here
http://www.jibjab.com/jokebox/jokebox/jibjab/id/299895/jokeid/60523
I think the master key is believable.
I like everything you have done except for that tree all the way to the right....;^)
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