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Those Inflatable Santas: Eyepoppers to Eyesores
NY Times ^ | December 22, 2006 | PAUL VITELLO

Posted on 12/22/2006 4:11:03 AM PST by King of Florida

HOLTSVILLE, N.Y., Dec. 19 — On a recent quiet afternoon, with few witnesses around, Homer Simpson, Santa Claus and a penguin perched on an igloo suddenly appeared here on the Long Island landscape as if from nowhere, unfolding slowly like Frankenstein monsters lurching to life on the table. As Homer’s extremities reached full size, his pink nylon fist puffed into Mr. Snow Man’s face — an involuntary attack, to be sure. Bop.

Such is the phantasmagoric, Disney-esque experience of the new Christmas custom sweeping the suburbs.

Whatever else Christmas in America means — the birth of Jesus, holly wreaths, the Chipmunks, cultural tension — it now also includes these gargantuan, inflatable outdoor decorations, called “Airblowns” by their chief manufacturer.

They have been around for a while, but mark 2006 as the year these decorations became a full-blown fixture in the pantheon of holiday traditions — and, as is the holiday tradition, the subject of a rift.

Not quite a culture war. Call it an intramural disagreement among the Christmas crazed.

“Appalling,” Catherine Bruckner, a traditionalist who decorates only in holly and evergreen, sneered as she stopped her car in front of an inflated Santa playing poker with two shrewd-eyed reindeer in a menagerie totaling two dozen figures. “It’s bad enough to see those things on Halloween. At Christmas, they rise to a level of tackiness that is horrible.”

(Excerpt) Read more at nytimes.com ...


TOPICS: Society
KEYWORDS: christmas; inflatable
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The King decrees that these are the tackiest of the tacky! White lights are sufficient for the kingdom.
1 posted on 12/22/2006 4:11:04 AM PST by King of Florida
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To: King of Florida

I can FedEx you some snow...


2 posted on 12/22/2006 4:12:58 AM PST by ken5050
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To: King of Florida

God, I HATE those things.


3 posted on 12/22/2006 4:13:57 AM PST by ShadowDancer (No autopsy, no foul.)
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To: ken5050

Send some to me too, will ya? Record highs in the middle 50's today. This does not feel like Christmas.


4 posted on 12/22/2006 4:15:18 AM PST by ShadowDancer (No autopsy, no foul.)
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To: King of Florida

I saw a really funny one the other day...the santa had deflated somewhat, and was bent forward with his face on the lower half of a somewhat deflated elf!

It was kind of perverted looking!


5 posted on 12/22/2006 4:17:29 AM PST by rlmorel (Islamofacism: It is all fun and games until someone puts an eye out. Or chops off a head.)
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To: ShadowDancer

Ugh, I know what you mean. At least our temps are now lowering into the 50's, just a few days ago it was 70!! I want snow so badly. :(


6 posted on 12/22/2006 4:19:23 AM PST by EmilyGeiger
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To: ken5050
Deal! I grew up up north, and I can't believe my younguns are going to grow up without snow, fireplaces, chimneys, sleds, mittens, etc.

I'm still trying to settle on the best story for how Santa gets in the house without a chimney. I haven't been asked yet (my oldest is barely 3), but it seems to be between (1) he shrinks himself down to the size of an ant and enters under the door; (2) he magically creates his own chimney and fireplace just to enter; or (3) he's got a master key that works in every door and lets himself in.

7 posted on 12/22/2006 4:20:44 AM PST by King of Florida (A little government and a little luck are necessary in life, but only a fool trusts either of them.)
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To: King of Florida
Neighbors across the street have a 12ft. high Santa standing amongst multiple "relatively" smaller balloon figures. Santa reaches their second story windows. Neighbors to the right have 3 six foot figures, Santa, a penguin and Winnie-the-Pooh. During the daytime, the cul-de-sac looks like trailertrash heaven with all these large deflated pieces of plastic laying around.

I'm not much of a fan of these things but at the same time, there's a very up-scale neighborhood around the corner and every house, and I mean EVERY house is decorated in white lights. It's not gaudy by any means but it sure lacks a little color as the dog and I stroll through on our late evening walks.

Also, we seem to be experiencing the same population control problems with those white animated deer that we have with the real things...

8 posted on 12/22/2006 4:34:06 AM PST by Hatteras
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To: King of Florida

We have one fellow in the area that creates over-sized ornaments (2ft+) with christmas lights and hangs them from his two very large trees out front. Every year I have always been impressed because it's simple (as in "not tacky") and it's original. Each year he adds a few more. This year however, he has taken the leap into tackyville. He now has a large banner out front that says "Tree of Lights - Sponsored by So-and-So's Automotive Service and there are boxes at the curb with flyers for discount brake jobs and all your automotive needs.


9 posted on 12/22/2006 4:42:57 AM PST by Hatteras
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To: Hatteras
That's the thing -- even if you have a bazillion lights on your house, you don't really notice anything during the day. But with these airblowns, it looks like the garbage men were drunk and left big pieces of trash on the lawn.

I've always liked colored lights -- I suppose because that's what I grew up with -- but my wife convinced me that all white lights were the way to go -- even on the tree (and silver and gold ornaments only!). It probably does look the most elegant, but I may have to convince her that our kids will find all of this a lot more appealing if it's colorful.

10 posted on 12/22/2006 5:01:22 AM PST by King of Florida (A little government and a little luck are necessary in life, but only a fool trusts either of them.)
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To: Hatteras
I'm not much of a fan of these things but at the same time, there's a very up-scale neighborhood around the corner and every house, and I mean EVERY house is decorated in white lights. It's not gaudy by any means but it sure lacks a little color as the dog and I stroll through on our late evening walks.

Gotta have the color lights .. and being gaudy to a point is ok .. it's Christmas time and the kids love the color

There is house a few blocks away from me that is decorated like a real Gingerbread House - Very kewl looking

But this many blow ups is just a tad too much


11 posted on 12/22/2006 5:07:19 AM PST by Mo1 (Thank You Mr & Mrs "I'm gonna teach you a lesson" Voter ... you just screwed us on so many levels)
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To: rlmorel
I saw a really funny one the other day...the santa had deflated somewhat, and was bent forward with his face on the lower half of a somewhat deflated elf! It was kind of perverted looking!

Thats funny! You should have taken a picture!!

12 posted on 12/22/2006 5:08:36 AM PST by Tatze (Tagline Free since May 2006)
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To: Mo1

Santa knows it's Christmas when he chases with 7-3 offsuit and catches a board like that.


13 posted on 12/22/2006 5:35:44 AM PST by TheyConvictedOglethorpe
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To: King of Florida

The really crass decorations are the ones that require an electric blower to keep them inflated. Usually, the homeowners inflate and illuminate them at night and for some unknown reason they pull the plug during daylight hours.

Some front lawns resemble a surreal North Pole battlefield.

14 posted on 12/22/2006 5:41:24 AM PST by Cagey
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To: rlmorel

I doubt that it was an accident.

Folks around here all have those wooden or wire reindeer in their front yard. One year, some pranksters went through the neighborhood and put them all in sexual positions. Pretty funny!


15 posted on 12/22/2006 5:43:32 AM PST by Muzzle_em (A proud warrior of the Pajamahadeen)
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To: King of Florida
but I may have to convince her that our kids will find all of this a lot more appealing if it's colorful.

The outside of my house is done in all white lights, that's what I prefer, but I make a concession with the tree inside for the kids, that has colored lights on it.

16 posted on 12/22/2006 5:44:31 AM PST by ShadowDancer (No autopsy, no foul.)
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To: Cagey
Usually, the homeowners inflate and illuminate them at night and for some unknown reason they pull the plug during daylight hours.

Yeah, what's up with that? Daytime around here looks like a warzone, with all the Santa carcasses thrown about.

17 posted on 12/22/2006 5:45:19 AM PST by 1rudeboy
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To: Cagey

OMG, they killed Santa


18 posted on 12/22/2006 5:46:11 AM PST by Mo1 (Thank You Mr & Mrs "I'm gonna teach you a lesson" Voter ... you just screwed us on so many levels)
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To: 1rudeboy
Yeah, what's up with that?

It's because if their electric bills .. those things, especially if you have a few of them can draw alot of electricity

19 posted on 12/22/2006 5:48:16 AM PST by Mo1 (Thank You Mr & Mrs "I'm gonna teach you a lesson" Voter ... you just screwed us on so many levels)
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To: King of Florida

We have a 'key' that we hang from the door handle on the outside on Christmas Eve. After he uses it he leaves it hanging on the inside of the door.


20 posted on 12/22/2006 5:49:34 AM PST by ShadowDancer (No autopsy, no foul.)
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