Remember: FR has banned all posting of exit polls!
Wish the news media would do the same.
Almost forgot the public service announcement.
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Democrats--If you missed your opportunity to vote during Election Day, yesterday, all is not lost.
Since this is America, land of the second chances, you will get another opportunity to vote.
First, make sure you get to the polls. You will need directions. Better yet, find a Republican, they know how to read and can help you.
First, get yourself to New York City and rent a car--don't worry, Republicans can help you read the contract. Also, please be sure to ignore all those signs that say November 7 is Election Day--that's only for Republicans. Oh, be sure to ask your Republican helper if he or she has voted. They are taking time from their Election Day to help you.
After you get your car, find Highway 87. Ask your Republican helper, they can point the numbers out to you if you don't recognize them. They are here to help. Drive north. Keep driving north. For about eight hours. Don't worry, you have time.
Don't mind the sign that says "Welcome to Canada", that's just been put there by Republicans to discourage you from getting to your polling place. Thank the Republican custom officials for letting you to get on to voting.
You're looking for a place called Montreal. That's French for "Vote Here".
Find a hotel, and then head out on Wednesday morning to cast your ballot.
The nice people of Montreal will be sure to tell you where to go.