Posted on 10/27/2006 6:17:01 PM PDT by PJ-Comix
Rotary dial cell phones.
I think the next big thing in cell phones will be phones equipped with a new Rove-band com channel we can use to coordinate campaigns to round up DUmmies and put them in Wal*mart detention centers.
My folks were very SLOW to adapt to technology. They kept their rotary phone way after it was obsolete. One day I was visiting them and SLOOOOWLY started dialing a number. Finally I just got so frustrated in the middle of this that I yelled and smashed the damn phone on the floor and brought my folks up to date with a touch tone phone.
Next big thing? Cell phones shaped like huge vibrators that ALSO have electronic toothbrush attachments!!! Oh... wait... is that gross? Hm... maybe I shouldn't drink and freep....
I actually know of people who don't yet have bluetooth phones but have bought Bluetooth dummie earpieces to wear as a fashion accessory. IOW, those earpieces have NO electronics in them. Strictly plastic and used as a fashion accessory only.
Geez, just what I want. Somebody browsing the internet while they're supposed to be driving. It's bad enough that they're allowed to talk on the phone and lose all sense of what's going on around them while they're driving.
I always laugh watching movies made in the 90s where the characters are using big brick cellphones. There was one scene in Lethal Weapon 4 where several of the characters pulled out their gigantic brick phones at the same time.
Well, then they would disconnect from the web while driving. However it would be great, for example, for guys waiting for their wives at the shopping malls to do the shopping. Then they wouldn't be bored. Also it would make walking exercises less boring.
Sometimes advances in technology are never really advances. They can come up with all sorts of new video games but NOTHING will ever beat PacMan. BTW, you can buy the PacMan video game cheap at Best Buy. Or at least it was available last year.
I think Scott Adams thought of this first; he had a strip where Dilbert was walking around with his head thrown back, fingers twitching in the air in front of him. He comes across a man doing the same thing and says "Ah, I see you are an engineer!" The other guy goes "No, I'm retarded. Common mistake."
Or something like that.
The next big gimmick will be in billing.
Right now, if you were use your cell phone to call me, you have to pay -- but with this new gimmick, I would pay as well, even though you are the one placing the call. So we would both end up paying for a call with this new billing gimmick.
And right now, if I were to call you, I have to pay -- but with this new gimmick, you pay as well. And we would both end up paying for the call with this new billing gimmick.
Oh wait, never mind. That's already been done.
How 'bout a cell phone that does nothing but make phone calls?
The Bluetooth has become such a fashion accessory that there is even a limited edition gold finish Dolce Gabbana version of the Motorola H700 with the letters "DG" printed on it. It works exactly like the standard version but has the god finish and lettering. I won't be surprised to see limited edition diamond encrusted Bluetooths in the near future.
I did try the bowling game from the games menu of my cellphone. DUmbest electronic game ever!
I'm thinking an earpiece that is the size of a pin head and a mircophone implanted in a tooth. The keypad will be in a wristwatch.
I'm thinking an earpiece that is the size of a pin head and a mircophone implanted in a tooth. The keypad will be in a wristwatch.
Swiss company GoldVish has produced and sold a diamond studded cell phone for 1.2 million.
For that price, I guess you would not mind that billing gimmick...
Just give me a strong signal and a clear connection. I just want to make a damn phone call.
I like all the geegaws. Don't you want to communicate like Jack Bauer?
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