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How to Overcome Nymphomania
FoxNews ^ | 10/12/06 | Staff

Posted on 10/13/2006 8:14:24 AM PDT by Millee

Michelle and Brian Watters are hoping you will judge their books by their covers … but maybe that's because the covers are all they're selling.

Say you're stuck on a plane next to a chatty neighbor, and you want nothing more than to be left alone. Thanks to the Watters, you can just open up your hardback copy of "How to Murder a Complete Stranger … and Get Away With It" and odds are you'll get your wish.

The Ottawa couple is selling individual self-help book jackets sporting comical titles — and they're hoping readers with an active funny bone will help themselves, the Canadian Broadcasting Corporation reports.

Among their eccentric offerings are "How to Overcome Nymphomania" (sure to get you some dates), "Do-It Yourself Vasectomy" (for the medical enthusiast with an independent streak) and "The Nutritional Benefits of Nose-Picking" (a must-read for any aspiring culinary artist) — to name a few.

"These are great if your mother wants the latest Danielle Steele for Christmas. You put 'How to Make Your Mother a Porn Star' on the cover [of the actual Danielle Steele book]," said Helen Aikenhead, owner of Ottawa bookstore Three Wild Women. "And when she opens it up on Christmas morning, she doesn't know what your intentions are."

And if your mom would be less than impressed, Michelle Watters suggests using the titles to … um … clear the air, so to speak.

"If you want to sit by yourself, and you don't want anyone bothering you, "Perfecting the Art of Fart Projection" will guarantee you a solo seat," she said.

The jackets are currently being sold in bookstores and boutiques in about a dozen countries for around $6.

(Excerpt) Read more at foxnews.com ...


TOPICS: Books/Literature; Humor
KEYWORDS:
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To: Toby06

You're the cure, huh? :)


61 posted on 10/13/2006 9:09:45 AM PDT by linda_22003
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To: Toby06; linda_22003

Don't listen to him, Linda! Only *I* can help you, and at the same time protect you from dastardly cads like Toby06.


62 posted on 10/13/2006 9:10:46 AM PDT by Oberon (What does it take to make government shrink?)
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To: linda_22003

He's less of a cure than a management therapy...


63 posted on 10/13/2006 9:11:23 AM PDT by gridlock (The 'Pubbies will pick up at least TWO seats in the Senate and FOUR seats in the House in 2006)
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To: Oberon

Having checked your profile, it looks like resistance could get me shot. :)


64 posted on 10/13/2006 9:13:05 AM PDT by linda_22003
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To: linda_22003

If you don't have a sidearm, you can borrow one of mine. =]


65 posted on 10/13/2006 9:14:19 AM PDT by Oberon (What does it take to make government shrink?)
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To: linda_22003; Toby06
You're the cure, huh? :)

Bwahahahahahaha!! He's done wonders for me with my alcohol recovery. {{hic}}

66 posted on 10/13/2006 9:21:34 AM PDT by Millee (A joke then, a joke N.O.W.)
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To: Mr. Mojo

We were in the nick of time, you were in great peril.

I don't think I was.

Yes you were, you were in terrible peril.

Look, let me go back in there and face the peril.

No, it's too perilous.

Look, I'm a knight, I'm supposed to get as much peril as I can.

No, we've got to find the Holy Grail. Come on!

Well, let me have just a little bit of peril?

No, it's unhealthy.

Bet you're gay!

No, I'm not.


67 posted on 10/13/2006 9:22:57 AM PDT by Hatteras
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To: Millee
""Do-It Yourself Vasectomy"

Ranks right up there with "Brain Surgery for Dummies", don't it?

Here's the best "abstinence" visualization I can think of for birth control, though:


68 posted on 10/13/2006 9:24:32 AM PDT by traditional1
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To: Millee
Is that a picture of you in a burka?
69 posted on 10/13/2006 9:24:51 AM PDT by fanfan ("We don't start fights my friends, but we finish them, and never leave until our work is done."PMSH)
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To: Always Right

I shoulda read your post before I put up the birth control picture!


70 posted on 10/13/2006 9:25:27 AM PDT by traditional1
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To: fanfan
Yes.
71 posted on 10/13/2006 9:27:12 AM PDT by Millee (A joke then, a joke N.O.W.)
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To: Millee

Take that cover off, Woman!!!


72 posted on 10/13/2006 9:29:39 AM PDT by fanfan ("We don't start fights my friends, but we finish them, and never leave until our work is done."PMSH)
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To: Millee

"How to Overcome Nymphomania"

Umm... say "I" and "Do" as a sentence in response to a question?
*ducks and runs*


73 posted on 10/13/2006 9:30:02 AM PDT by Darksheare (Please, don't pinch the alias.)
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To: Darksheare

74 posted on 10/13/2006 9:31:26 AM PDT by Millee (A joke then, a joke N.O.W.)
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To: Millee; najida; Xenalyte

~sigh!~ Does this mean the secret's out? That everyone will know what we're REALLY doing when we're bouncing our crossed legs? <:-O


75 posted on 10/13/2006 9:31:46 AM PDT by Froufrou
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To: Froufrou
I haven't crossed my legs in yea.. Yep, our secret's out.....
76 posted on 10/13/2006 9:33:30 AM PDT by Millee (A joke then, a joke N.O.W.)
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To: Millee

Requires "Snow White Queen" as a response....
http://www.leoslyrics.com/listlyrics.php?hid=6zQnKbSwnpg%3D
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=NPxMA55g3xY


77 posted on 10/13/2006 9:33:48 AM PDT by Darksheare (Please, don't pinch the alias.)
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To: Jaysun
Shouldn't the title include a (For Males Only) alert?

By definition, nymphomania is for women only.

Men have satyriasis.

SD

78 posted on 10/13/2006 9:39:19 AM PDT by SoothingDave
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To: najida

A personal shopper & hairdresser? hmmmmmmm

One correction. A 'boy toy' is a woman who is the 'love' interest of a man, while a 'toy boy' is a man who is the 'love' interest of a woman.

Both terms originate din England.


79 posted on 10/13/2006 9:40:57 AM PDT by Perdogg (Democratic Party - The political wing of Al Qaida)
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To: Darksheare
{eh-hem} You find some.....interesting lyrics.....

(Who turned the t/stat up in here????)

80 posted on 10/13/2006 9:41:04 AM PDT by Millee (A joke then, a joke N.O.W.)
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