Mmmmmmm bacon flavored fruit roll-ups.
AAAAAAAAAGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGG!
Posted on 10/05/2006 4:17:21 PM PDT by Shermy
A MAN who stuffed a bacon roll in the mouth of a garage manager before punching him has escaped a jail sentence.
Andre Cartwright, 36, had drunk 1.5 litres of vodka and a litre of Jack Daniels whiskey the night before he shoved the sandwich into the mouth of Peter Dodd, a court was told.
Redhill magistrates heard on Thursday last week that Cartwright carried out the unexpected attack on Mr Dodd after entering Tadworth Tyres,in Shelvers Hill, on August 19 and asking for the manager.
Leila Kessler, prosecuting, said that just beforehand Cartwright had bought the bacon roll from Munchies cafe on the same road.
Miss Kessler told the court Mr Dodd, the garage manager, was confronted by Cartwright in his office.
She said: "Mr Dodd asked him to leave, but the man started shouting and swearing at him. So he took him by the arm and again asked to him to leave, as he was concerned about customers and staff.
"The man then pushed a bacon roll in his mouth. Cartwright then punched him in the cheek with his fist and Mr Dodd fell into some tyres which were stacked up."
Mr Dodd was left with a split lip as a result, but he managed to hit Cartwright back before he left.
Richard Barnett, defending, said that Cartwright had made full admissions to the police and had not tried to justify his actions.
He said: "His only explanation is that he had drunk far too much.
"Looking at his previous convictions you will see a series of offences, because he had a problem with drugs and alcohol. That has been halted, but there are occasional lapses and this was one of them."
Mr Barnett said Cartwright, of Penrose Drive, Epsom, had since managed to turn his life around and that he was making good progress.
Magistrates said the incident was an unprovoked attack and ordered Cartwright to complete 180 hours' unpaid work in the community and forced him to pay £100 compensation to Mr Dodd.
Personally, I wonder what HIS BACon was when he was arrested.
I knew a guy in college that once drank an entire 5th of Everclear, half a bottle of Jack Daniels and assorted other drinks in a single night. He slept for about five days straight without moving or making a sound, according to his roommate. On the 5th day he rolled over, puked on the floor and then slept for two more days. Amazing he survived.
Mmmmmmm bacon flavored fruit roll-ups.
AAAAAAAAAGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGG!
Should have known. LOL!
After all, just how many people actually could have gone to college with Ted Kennedy?
On the 5th day he rolled over, puked on the floor and then slept for two more days. Amazing he survived. and voted for the Immigration reform Bill of 1965.
LOL! This happened only 20 years ago. Besides, Teddy refers to that volume of liquor as a warm up.
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