This was my Father's Day present:
I would probably cook on my grill every day in the summer, if my wife would let me.
Last night I grilled some thick boneless pork chops, 2 Vidalia onions and some fresh corn out of my garden.
Life is good.
Posted on 07/21/2006 5:56:55 AM PDT by CT-Freeper
Did you ever notice that the gas grill is the man's domain? Even in homes where the man of the house has never prepared a single meal in the kitchen -- unless you count pulling a package of Pop Tarts out of the box -- as soon as it's decided that dinner will be cooked on the gas grill, the man of the house eagerly dons his "Born to Barbecue" apron and announces to no one in particular, "OK, let's do some grillin'!!"
Of course, there are some men who enjoy all forms of cooking and know their way around the kitchen quite well. And then there are normal guys: those who wouldn't know which room in the house actually is the kitchen except that when they first moved into the house and rolled the refrigerator right next to the reclining chair in the living room (a very good location if you ask me), their wives exclaimed, "The fridge goes in the kitchen! No, honey, that's the dining room. Over here. See the linoleum floor, the sink, the stove? That's right. Good boy. Here's a doggie treat. Now go out to the truck and bring in the sofa. No, honey, that's a closet door. The front door is over there. That's right. Good boy."
Men are usually in charge of the gas grill because it employs an element of nature that gets men very excited: bikinis. No wait, wrong element of nature. Gas grills utilize a different element of nature that gets men just as excited, if not more excited, than bikinis: fire.
Thousands of years ago it was men who first discovered fire. Women did not discover fire because they were back home deciding which corner of the cave was the best place to locate the refrigerator. Just like that famous Greek guy, Archimedes, who exclaimed, "Eureka!" when he discovered the bubble bath, the first guy to discover fire -- his name was Ooog -- also uttered a memorable word. Upon discovering fire, Ooog exclaimed, "Aaaiiieeee!!!" The fire Ooog discovered was a brush fire caused by lightning.
Ooog looked at it curiously, and then thought to himself, "I wonder if that is just as refreshing to jump into as a cool stream?" Moments later, a smoldering Ooog declared his historic pronouncement.
Soon after, it was men who discovered that food tastes a lot better when it's placed in fire for a while. The specific guy who first discovered this important fact -- his name was Mooog -- offered these historic words, "Not bad, but Ooog would taste even better with ketchup."
Gas grilles are pretty much the only way for modern men to be in touch with their primitive side these days. Face it, in our society we are not allowed to have fun with fire. If you even own a cigarette lighter the Smoking Nazis want to lock you up. It's now against the law to burn piles of leaves in the Fall. If you start a fire in the fireplace, someone is sure to say, "Fireplace soot is bad for little Leonard's asthma! Put that out at once or I'll call the Soot Nazis!" And I need not mention that in these "politically correct" times, it is no longer socially acceptable to entertain the neighborhood kids by breaking out Uncle Mike's World War II surplus flamethrower.
So modern men are basically flame-less these days -- except when it comes to the gas grill season. Then, thankfully, we are allowed to singe our eyebrows and arm hair to our heart's content.
Guys, in the immortal words of our pioneering forebears, please join me in a hearty, "Aaaiiieeee!!!"
Bill Dunn is a free-lance writer who resides in Torrington. He can be reached via his Web site at: www.boomertrek.com.
....whatever blows your dress up. I have a friend that wants his beer lukewarm...not hot or even room temp, but certainly not cold.
I would probably cook on my grill every day in the summer, if my wife would let me.
Last night I grilled some thick boneless pork chops, 2 Vidalia onions and some fresh corn out of my garden.
Life is good.
Jersey corn?!?!
You in Jersey? Exit 2 here.
Jersey Silver Queen is the BEST!
How do you make a cat go "Woof"?
Douse it in gas and throw a match at it.
Where did you buy it? HD, Lowe's? I'm thinking/hoping I might catch one at the end-of-season sale.
I got mine at Lowe's - it does a great job. If you want the version with the side fire box, I strongly recommend, however, that you let them assemble it for you. I bought mine "in the box" and the assembly was a little more difficult than I anticipated.
The main grill section only took about 20 minutes, but adding the side fire box took another hour and a half! The reason is there are tack-welded metal plates that have to be knocked or drilled out before attaching the firebox. If you're doing this in a well-equipped workshop it's not a problem, but doing it in your yard or, e.g. on an apartment balcony is a bit harder. I didn't have a drill handy and had to do some serious hammering with a punch!
Sure sounds like it.
Amazingly, my in-laws, who were over for a 4th of July picnic, had never heard of grilling corn.
Actually, I have an outside electric grill. It has lava rock under the heating element that acts like hot coals. I just drop a handfull of wood chips on the rock and it provides a wonderful smoke flavor to the meat.
Yup, Brinkmans are $$.
I've been smoking with the Aussie BBQ from the Depot. Coals & chips in front, meat in the back. Just enough room for 1 rack of spareribs. Does just fine, but I'm ready to move up into something bigger and better suited to the purpose.
I'm looking for something in the $200 range, looks like this is it. I'd just like to see it first.
>>You never have to struggle to get the coals lighted
A buddy of mine has solved that problem. Puts the coals in one of those starter chimneys, and places that over the 100,000+BTUh propane burner for a turkey fryer for about 5 minutes. Gets the coals started really quickly.
You've gotten over the terrible ankle boo-boo, yes? :D
Cool! Our "George Foreman" has a stand so we can use it outside if we want to.
Yeah, I just got one with a side-burner, so I'll even boil water for pasta outside, on a hot day.
A friend of my dad's was getting ready to go out Saturday night with his wife. Her hairspray can was clogging and she sprayed it repeatedly into the toilet to clear it.
When she was done, her hubby had to go the the bathroom before they left. He sat down on the toilet, and then dropped his smoked cigarette (still lit) into the toilet.
Launched him off the seat so hard he hit his head on the shelf over the toilet. So he had to go to the emergency room for stitches and second-degree burns on his arse.
Something you might not have tried.
I have a 'frying pan' with holes in it. Think I got it at BB&B.
Slice summer squash, zuchini, mushrooms,green peppers, onions. A little olive oil and grill them in the pan while doing the steaks. Start the veggies first.
Yummy
Thanks for the laugh!
One of the best 'balls of flame' I've seen comes from water sprayed on a grease fire. Some years ago I used to work in a restaurant which, upon request, would cook steaks in what we called 'Pittsburgh style' - steak cooked in a stainless steel pan on a gas burner, pour in melted butter and let it catch fire - the steak comes out medium-well to well-done on the outside but rare on the inside. After the steak is done, squirting the dishwasher spray hose at the burning pan results in a ball of flame rising up to greet the ceiling tiles.
It is VERY well made for the price.
Thanks!
Understand the difficuly potential with side-box assembly. But I have tools and patience. The result will be well worth the effort. Especially since Mrs. Red and the little Reds love my Q. It's good to be me :-)
See my trusty old Weber off to the side?
I didn't have the heart to trash it, so I took it down to our party cabin on the Tar River.
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