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To: Publius6961

Ladies. Stop blaming the dress! Its the fat that makes you look fat.

-Al Bundy


13 posted on 07/03/2006 3:34:40 PM PDT by SampleMan
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To: SampleMan

"A fat woman sloshed into the shoe store today. Said she was retaining water. I told her not to worry the dam of cellulite should keep us all safe for the next few years!"

"A fat woman clip-clops into the shoestore today and says "I want something I can feel comfortable in." so I said "Try Wyoming!"."

Fat Lady: I want my money back. I've worn these shoes only once and they split at the sides.
Al: Let me explain. Just like an elevator, there's a 2 ton weight limit. How about I just nail the soles to the bottom of your feet to give you added traction while you're pulling the ice wagon.
Fat Lady: You'll be hearing from my attorney.
Al: Is that the law firm of Haagen & Dazs?

"A fat woman walked into the shoe store today. She was so fat, she had three smaller women orbiting around her."

"A woman comes into the shoestore today, so huge she's protected by GreenPeace. She asked for a pair of sixe 4 so I asked if she'd eat them here or take them home. Then she has the nerver to complain about my performnce!"

"A fat woman godzillas into the shoe store today, she asks for something she could wear to walk in the woods. Jokingly I suggest she wear a sign that says "Don't shoot! From the front I look human!"."

“A fat woman came into the shoe store today. Wanted a pair of shoes for a Christmas party. I told her to stand on her hands, put a star in her butt and go as the world’s largest, ugliest tree!”


20 posted on 07/03/2006 4:49:07 PM PDT by lowbridge (I want to die peacefully in my sleep like my grandfather. Not screaming, like his passengers.)
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To: SampleMan

Go Al !


21 posted on 07/03/2006 5:29:13 PM PDT by festus (The constitution may be flawed but its a whole lot better than what we have now.)
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