One of the little known rich white people rituals which insures victory for the Lacrosse team involves raping black street walkers with broomsticks.
Done properly it makes ATM receipts appear from thin air and clouds the minds of cab drivers so they'll corroborate your false claims of innocence.
I'm surprised you haven't heard about them.
L
Why are you diclosing all of the super-secret, rich, white guy magic stuff?? You have violated the code. You will be shunned!