Could you send this article to my screen? (end/sarcasm)
And in keeping with the subject, a few Jack Bauer jokes:
Upon hearing that he was played by Kiefer Sutherland, Jack Bauer killed Sutherland. Jack Bauer gets played by no man.
Jack Bauers calender goes from April 2nd to March 31st, no one fools Jack Bauer.
Jack Bauer once forgot where he put his keys. He then spent the next half-hour torturing himself until he gave up the location of the keys.
Jack Bauer played Russian Roulette with a fully loaded gun and won.
"Jack Bauer's favorite color is 'Terrorist Threat Level Red'. He also likes violet, but only because it sounds like 'violent'."
It's not use crying over spilt milk.
Unless that milk was Jack Bau...
Oh man! You are Sooo screwed!