[Genesis defender]

Ah yes, killing two birds with one stone: getting much needed uranium and purifying the planet's water.

But back to my hypothetical question: if one were to drink the desalinized water before we extracted the trace elements of Uranium, would our urine glow in the dark?

[NicknamedBob]

"... if one were to drink the desalinized water before we extracted the trace elements of Uranium ..."

Where did you get the idea the water was being desalinated? We extract what we want through selective adsorption.

To answer your question, however, no, but there are ways to do that without poisoning yourself.

A little extra Vitamin C and a black light will get you started.

Or see Sionnsar about how to squeeze a cat to get the effect you want.