Posted on 02/11/2006 8:33:45 AM PST by lawnguy
Freepers, I would like your favorite chili recipes.
I know many of these recipes are top secret, but I will be happy to settle for those in the public domain.:-)
Thank You!!
Never got into pigs feet, or those pickled eggs floating in that red juice -- what is that? Don't like chitlins or any other entrails or organ meat -- except for liver and onions, which I have given up. Don't even like pork rinds. Just a picky southern girl. But I do love my grits.
My brother is the sultan of hot in our family. Sounds like a good thing to try out on him!
and the chitlins.
and the pickled bowled eggs.
btw, DD, I've never eaten any of that stuff in my life. We're cultured (snicker)...we stick to hoe cakes, fried ham, and pickled ocra.
Franks words: "Recently, I was honored to be selected as a judge at a chili cook-off. The original person called in sick at the last moment and I happened to be standing there at the judge's table asking for directions to the Budweiser truck, when the call came in. I was assured by the other two judges (Native Texans) that the chili wouldn't be all that spicy and, besides, they told me I could have free beer during the tasting, So I accepted".
Here are the scorecards from the event:
Chili # 1 Mike's Maniac Mobster Monster Chili
Judge # 1 -- A little too heavy on the tomato. Amusing kick.
Judge # 2 -- Nice, smooth tomato flavor. Very mild
Judge # 3 -- (Frank) Holy sh*t, what the hell is this stuff? You could remove dried paint from your driveway. Took me two beers to put the flames out. I hope that's the worst one. These Texans are crazy.
Chili # 2 Arthur's Afterburner Chili
Judge # 1 -- Smoky, with a hint of pork. Slight jalapeno tang.
Judge # 2 -- Exciting BBQ flavor, needs more peppers to be taken seriously.
Judge # 3 -- (Frank) Keep this out of the reach of children. I'm not sure what I'm supposed to taste besides pain. I had to wave off two people who wanted to give me the Heimlich maneuver. They had to rush in more beer when they saw the look on my face.
Chili # 3 Fred's Famous Burn Down the Barn Chili
Judge # 1 -- Excellent firehouse chili. Great kick. Needs more beans.
Judge # 2 -- A beanless chili, a bit salty, good use of peppers.
Judge # 3 -- (Frank) Call the EPA. I've located a uranium spill. My nose feels like I have been snorting Drano. Everyone knows the routine by now. Get me more beer before I ignite. Barmaid pounded me on the back, now my backbone is in the front part of my chest. I'm getting sh*t-faced from all of the beer.
Chili # 4 Bubba's Black Magic
Judge # 1 -- Black bean chili with almost no spice. Disappointing.
Judge # 2 -- Hint of lime in the black beans. Good side dish for fish or other mild foods, not much of a chili.
Judge # 3 -- I felt something scraping across my tongue, but was unable to taste it. Is it possible to burn out tastebuds? Sally, the barmaid, was standing behind me with fresh refills. That 300-lb. bitch is starting to look HOT...just like this nuclear waste I'm eating! Is chili an aphrodisiac? (Good ol' Frank)
Chili # 5 Linda's Legal Lip Remover
Judge # 1 -- Meaty, strong chili. Cayenne peppers freshly ground, adding considerable kick. Very impressive.
Judge # 2 -- Chili using shredded beef, could use more tomato. Must admit the cayenne peppers make a strong statement.
Judge # 3 -- My ears are ringing, sweat is pouring off my forehead and I can no longer focus my eyes. I farted and four people behind me needed paramedics. The contestant seemed offended when I told her that her chili had given me brain damage. Sally saved my tongue from bleeding by pouring beer directly on it from the pitcher. I wonder if I'm burning my lips off. It really pisses me off that the other judges asked me to stop screaming. Screw those rednecks. (Never at a loss for words)
Chili # 6 Vera's Very Vegetarian Variety
Judge # 1 -- Thin yet bold vegetarian variety chili. Good balance of spices and peppers.
Judge # 2 -- The best yet. Aggressive use of peppers, onions, and garlic. Superb.
Judge # 3 -- My intestines are now a straight pipe filled with gaseous, sulfuric flames. I crapped myself when I farted and I'm worried it will eat through the chair. No one seems inclined to stand behind me except that slut Sally. She must be kinkier than I thought. Can't feel my lips anymore. I need to wipe my ass with a snow cone.
Chili # 7 Susan's Screaming Sensation Chili
Judge # 1 -- A mediocre chili with too much reliance on canned peppers.
Judge # 2 -- Ho hum, tastes as if the chef literally threw in a can of chili peppers at the last moment. I should take note that I am worried about Judge # 3. He appears to be in a bit of distress as he is cursing uncontrollably.
Judge # 3 -- You could put a grenade in my mouth, pull the pin, and I wouldn't feel a thing. I've lost sight in one eye, and the world sounds like it is made of rushing water. My shirt is covered with chili which slid unnoticed out of my mouth. My pants are full of lava-like poo to match my shirt. At least during the autopsy, they'll know what killed me. I've decided to stop breathing, its too painful. Screw it, I'm not getting any oxygen anyway. If I need air, I'll just suck it in through the 4-inch hole in my stomach.
Chili # 8 Tommy's Toe-Nail Curling Chili
Judge # 1 -- The perfect ending, this is a nice blend chili. Not too bold but spicy enough to declare its existence.
Judge # 2 -- This final entry is a good, balanced chili. Neither mild nor hot. Sorry to see that most of it was lost when Judge # 3 passed out, fell over and pulled the chili pot down on top of himself. Not sure if he's going to make it. Poor dude, wonder how he'd have reacted to really hot chili.
ever put tomatoes in your grits?
I'll go where Mason is!
He's a cutie! Plus, I'm his Godmother! Right?
You said it, MamaTexan. (Sorry about your picky kid. Mine drive me nuts. Don't know where they get it!)
Thank you, Lady Jag...I've been thinking about that story.
Fried okra too? I love fried okra.
No way! :-)
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Something I never got the hang of making was Green Chili.
Not what I would consider Tex Mex, but I lived in New Mexico for a while, and that's some good stuff!
Love fried okra! And boiled okra - favorite meal is okra, tomatoes with Dukes mayo, and butter beans.
ROFL!
No rule I know of says you can't practice once or twice, before going for the gusto. Start off w/a serrano or a hot Fresno. When you're comfy w/that, try a bite of a hab or a bonnet.
what's in Green Chili?
My family has no appreciation for these things. Sigh. Just the thought makes me feel warm and fuzzy. Good memories.
Pickled anything other than pickles never did much fer me.
FRIED okra...yummy, crispy, cornmeal covered golden nuggets.
drool
I love ho cakes, ham, grits, greens, biscuits, black eyed peas, sweet potatoes, okra, etc. etc.
You can keep the chitlins, pickled pigs feet, pickled eggs, and the cheddar cheese on pizza and cottage cheese in lasagna.
geez, I'm getting hungry!
how 'bout ricotta cheese in lasagna?
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