Free Republic
Browse · Search
General/Chat
Topics · Post Article

Skip to comments.

Top 7 Worst Christmas Songs
PA Times | 11/29/05 | Santa Pissant

Posted on 11/29/2005 11:30:51 AM PST by pissant

Last year, we ran through the list of best Christmas songs and carols. Lotsa of great memories. This year, it's time to list the WORST Christmas songs ever recorded. Some are because the version performed by the "artist" is horrid. Others because the song itself is weak and irritating. You be the judge.

Either way, I had a difficult time paring down the list. I left off "novelty" songs by the Chipmunks and Donald Duck, etc. They were intended to annoy, and thus were successful in their own right!

Top 7 Worst Christmas Songs Ever Recorded

7. Blue Christmas - by ANYONE OTHER THAN ELVIS PRESLEY -- Great song when sung by the King. Otherwise it is grating beyond belief.

6. 12 days of Christmas - various artists -- Why anyone listens to this silly thing is beyond me

5. Frosty the Snowman - various artists -- As annoying to me as the TV cartoon trotted out each year

4. Do They Know It's Christmas - Band Aid -- Another Bob Geldof save the starving biafrins effort. Truly unlistenable. With singing contributions from Boy George, Stink (Sting to some), and Wham, it is doomed to make many "worst" lists until it is completely forgotten about.

3. So This is Christmas - John Lennon -- As bad, if not worse, than his retarded Give Peace A Chance. A dirge for the ages.

2. Santa Clause is Coming to Town - Bruce Springsteen -- Truly pathetic, like 98% of his constipated sounding songs.

1. Santa Clause is Coming to Town - Jackson Five -- Truly the most irritating vocals I've ever heard, by a screeching young Michael Jackson. Nails on Chalkboards sound like Pavoratti by comparison


TOPICS: Chit/Chat; Music/Entertainment
KEYWORDS: cheesy; christmasmusic
Navigation: use the links below to view more comments.
first previous 1-20 ... 41-6061-8081-100 ... 181-189 next last
To: fnord

Thank you, that version cracks me up.


61 posted on 11/29/2005 12:09:48 PM PST by gate2wire
[ Post Reply | Private Reply | To 55 | View Replies]

To: retrokitten

LOL...hopefully you will be spared that this year.


62 posted on 11/29/2005 12:10:38 PM PST by EX52D ((NO! It isn't a bra size!))
[ Post Reply | Private Reply | To 59 | View Replies]

To: EX52D

She changed it about 2 weeks before Christmas, because even she was that sick of it. LOL


63 posted on 11/29/2005 12:11:52 PM PST by retrokitten (www.retrosrants.blogspot.com)
[ Post Reply | Private Reply | To 62 | View Replies]

To: pissant
So This is Christmas - John Lennon

I must agree with you there. It is not only cloying, simple-minded and puerile, but actually resulted in one of the most uncharitable thoughts I ever recall having.

64 posted on 11/29/2005 12:12:11 PM PST by andy58-in-nh (In war, the only intelligent exit strategy is Victory.)
[ Post Reply | Private Reply | To 1 | View Replies]

To: Clemenza

Elmo & Patsy ROCK!


65 posted on 11/29/2005 12:12:24 PM PST by Redcloak (We'll raise up our glasses against evil forces singin' "whiskey for my men and beer for my horses!")
[ Post Reply | Private Reply | To 12 | View Replies]

To: pissant
8. Santa Claus Is Going To Hacksaw You Apart And Eat Your Eyeballs -- Lazamataz, 2005

9. Merry ****ing Christmas, Mr. Garrison, South Park, 2003

66 posted on 11/29/2005 12:13:25 PM PST by Lazamataz (When life gives you lemons, kick it in the shins and take its wallet.)
[ Post Reply | Private Reply | To 1 | View Replies]

To: pissant
Tisk, Tisk, Tisk.
Over 60 posts, and not a single mention of “The Twelve Pains of Christmas”

(Chorus) The First Thing at Christmas, that’s such a pain to me,
(Chorus)…is finding a Christmas tree.

(Chorus) The Second Thing at Christmas, that’s such a pain to me,
(Redneck Male)…Rigging up the lights…
(Chorus) …and finding a Christmas tree.

(Chorus) The Third Thing at Christmas, that’s such a pain to me,
(Archie Bunker)…hangovers…
(Redneck Male)…rigging up the lights…
(Chorus) …and finding a Christmas tree.

(Chorus) The Fourth thing at Christmas, that’s such a pain to me,
(Gay Male)…sending Christmas cards…
(Archie Bunker)…hangovers…
(Redneck Male)…rigging up the lights!…
(Chorus) …and finding a Christmas tree.

(Chorus) The Fifth thing at Christmas, that’s such a pain to me,
(Chorus) …FIVE MONTHS OF BILLS!…
(Gay Male)…sending Christmas cards…
(Archie Bunker)…hangovers…
(Redneck Male)…rigging up the lights!!…
(Chorus) …and finding a Christmas tree.

(Chorus) The Sixth thing at Christmas, that’s such a pain to me,
(Frazzled Bronx Wife)…facing my in-laws…
(Chorus) …FIVE MONTHS OF BILLS!…
(Gay Male)…oh, I hate those Christmas cards…
(Archie Bunker)…hangovers…
(Redneck Male)…rigging up these lights!!!…
(Chorus) …and finding a Christmas tree.

(Chorus) The Seventh thing at Christmas, that’s such a pain to me,
(Frazzled Bronx Husband)…The Salvation Army…
(Frazzled Bronx Wife)…facing my in-laws…
(Chorus) …FIVE MONTHS OF BILLS!…
(Gay Male)…sending Christmas cards…
(Archie Bunker)…oh jeez…
(Redneck Male)…I’m trying to rig up these lights!!!!…
(Chorus) …and finding a Christmas tree.

(Chorus) The Eighth thing at Christmas, that’s such a pain to me,
(Spoiled Rotten, Screaming, 5 year old)…I want a TRANSFORMER for Christmas!…
(Frazzled Bronx Husband)…charities..and what do you mean, YOUR in-laws?!?…
(Chorus) …FIVE MONTHS OF BILLS!…
(Gay Male)…uhh…making out these cards…
(Archie Bunker)…Edith, get me a beer, huh?…
(Redneck Male)…What, we have NO EXTENSION CORDS?!?!…
(Chorus) …and finding a Christmas tree.

(Chorus) The Ninth thing at Christmas, that’s such a pain to me,
(Male)…finding parking spaces…
(Spoiled Rotten, Screaming, 5 year old)…Daddy, I WANT SOME CANDY!!!…
(Frazzled Bronx Husband)…Donations!…
(Frazzled Bronx Wife)…facing my in-laws…
(Chorus) …FIVE MONTHS OF BILLS!…
(Gay Male)…writing out those Christmas cards…
(Archie Bunker)…hangovers…
(Redneck Male)…NOW WHY THE HELL ARE THEY BLINKING?!?!…
(Chorus) …and finding a Christmas tree.

(Chorus) The Tenth thing at Christmas, that’s such a pain to me,
(Female)…”Batteries not Included?!?!”…
(Male)…no parking spaces…
(Spoiled Rotten, Screaming, 5 year old)…BUY ME SOMETHING!!!…
(Frazzled Bronx Husband)…Get a Job, Ya Bum!!…
(Frazzled Bronx Wife)…ohh…facing the in-laws…
(Chorus) …FIVE MONTHS OF BILLS!…
(Gay Male)…Yo-ho, Sending Christmas Cards!!…
(Archie Bunker)…ah, jeez, look at this…
(Redneck Male)…ONE LIGHT GOES OUT, THEY ALL GO OUT!!!!…
(Chorus) …and finding a Christmas tree.

(Chorus) The Eleventh thing at Christmas, that’s such a pain to me,
(2nd Gay Male)…stale TV specials!!…
(Female)…batteries not included…
(Male)…no parking spaces…
(Spoiled Rotten, Screaming, 5 year old)…Mommy, I GOTTA GO to the BAFFROOM!!…
(Frazzled Bronx Husband)…charities…
(Frazzled Bronx Wife)…she’s a witch, I hate her!…
(Chorus) …FIVE MONTHS OF BILLS!…
(Gay Male)…Oh, I don’t even KNOW half these people!!
(Archie Bunker)…oh, who’s got the terlet paper, huh?…
(Redneck Male)…GET A FLASHLIGHT, I BLEW A FUSE!!…
(Chorus) …and finding a Christmas tree.

(Chorus) The twelfth thing at Christmas, that’s such a pain to me,
(Chorus) …singing Christmas carols…
(2nd Gay Male)…stale TV specials…
(Female)…batteries not included…
(Male)…no parking!…
(Spoiled Rotten, Screaming, 5 year old)…WHAAAAAAAAAA!!!!!!!!!…
(Frazzled Bronx Husband)…charities…
(Frazzled Bronx Wife)…gotta make ‘em dinner…
(Chorus) …FIVE MONTHS OF BILLS!…
(Gay Male)…Oh that’s it! I’m not sending ‘em this year!
(Archie Bunker)…Shut Up, You!
(Redneck Male)…FINE, YOU’RE SO SMART, YOU RIG UP THE LIGHTS!…
(Chorus) …a-nd fin-ding a Chris-ist-mas treeeee-eeeeee-eeeeee-eeeeee.

67 posted on 11/29/2005 12:13:27 PM PST by cuz_it_aint_their_money (Why does a slight tax increase cost you $200 and a substantial tax cut saves you 30 cents?)
[ Post Reply | Private Reply | To 1 | View Replies]

To: thoughtomator

I like that one. They play it at AA meetings during Christmas. The chipmunks--well! All I want for Christmas is My Two Front Teeth---amerian dental assoc holiday theme song. One from the 1950s--I want a Hippopotomous for Christmas----something the PETA people could feel offended by.


68 posted on 11/29/2005 12:14:40 PM PST by brooklyn dave (Allah is a Moon god)
[ Post Reply | Private Reply | To 10 | View Replies]

To: HitmanNY
Damn, you are always one to stir up controversy! /s
69 posted on 11/29/2005 12:15:08 PM PST by Fierce Allegiance (Posts by Fierce Allegiance are copyright © 2005. Reuse without permission subject to $250 fee/ word)
[ Post Reply | Private Reply | To 13 | View Replies]

To: retrokitten

Sounds like you'll be safe this Christmas!


70 posted on 11/29/2005 12:15:38 PM PST by EX52D ((NO! It isn't a bra size!))
[ Post Reply | Private Reply | To 63 | View Replies]

To: pissant

Christmas Shoes


71 posted on 11/29/2005 12:16:16 PM PST by stocksthatgoup (Polls = Proof that when the MSM want your opinion it will give it to you.)
[ Post Reply | Private Reply | To 1 | View Replies]

To: FrogBurger

ping


72 posted on 11/29/2005 12:17:07 PM PST by conservatrice
[ Post Reply | Private Reply | To 71 | View Replies]

To: pissant

Those dogs barking out Jingle Bells


73 posted on 11/29/2005 12:17:22 PM PST by DenverGal
[ Post Reply | Private Reply | To 1 | View Replies]

To: pissant
This would seem to be a Christmas song that Pissant would like....
74 posted on 11/29/2005 12:18:45 PM PST by Born Conservative ("Going to war without France is like going deer hunting without your accordion." -Donald Rumsfeld)
[ Post Reply | Private Reply | To 1 | View Replies]

To: pissant
2. Santa Clause is Coming to Town - Bruce Springsteen --

If you had ever seen the Boss live during the holiday season, you might feel diffently. Bruce also rocks out on "Merry Christmas Baby"

75 posted on 11/29/2005 12:19:32 PM PST by WhiteGuy (Vote for gridlock)
[ Post Reply | Private Reply | To 1 | View Replies]

To: pissant
"Blue Christmas - by ANYONE OTHER THAN ELVIS PRESLEY -- Great song when sung by the King. Otherwise it is grating beyond belief. "

Gotta disagree.

The version done by Porky Pig is a strong number two. If you haven't heard it...I can host it somewhere I think.

"I'm a gonna have a beya-beya-beya-blue Christtmas...
weeya-weeya-weeya-without you..."

76 posted on 11/29/2005 12:21:29 PM PST by Bloody Sam Roberts (This is my tagline. There are many like it but this one is mine.)
[ Post Reply | Private Reply | To 1 | View Replies]

To: pissant

Let me revise your top five:

5) Grandma Got Run Over By A Reindeer
4) Grandma Got Run Over By A Reindeer
3) Grandma Got Run Over By A Reindeer
2) Grandma Got Run Over By A Reindeer
1) Grandma Got Run Over By A Reindeer

There. :)


77 posted on 11/29/2005 12:22:00 PM PST by Colonel_Flagg (Inertia: It's not just for breakfast anymore.)
[ Post Reply | Private Reply | To 1 | View Replies]

To: day10
Paul McCartney's "Wonderful Christmastime" (I think that's the title anyway)

I hate it.

BUMP!

78 posted on 11/29/2005 12:23:14 PM PST by BureaucratusMaximus (The 2005 Chicago White Sox---World Series Champs---WOO! HOO!)
[ Post Reply | Private Reply | To 18 | View Replies]

To: AxelPaulsenJr; pissant
Regis Philin's Christmas Album. Please someone tell this man he can't sing.

I have got to hear that....I'm threatening to get it for a couple of my friends who have pulled pranks on me in the past.

Isn't Donald Trump mixed up in that as well? (Making it even more of a weapon to use on friends who are "owed one?")

79 posted on 11/29/2005 12:23:56 PM PST by Allegra (Here-There-Here-There-Where Now?)
[ Post Reply | Private Reply | To 22 | View Replies]

To: Casloy
Jingle Bells with dogs barking. Annoying as hell.

It is funny the first time...

80 posted on 11/29/2005 12:25:13 PM PST by BureaucratusMaximus (The 2005 Chicago White Sox---World Series Champs---WOO! HOO!)
[ Post Reply | Private Reply | To 27 | View Replies]


Navigation: use the links below to view more comments.
first previous 1-20 ... 41-6061-8081-100 ... 181-189 next last

Disclaimer: Opinions posted on Free Republic are those of the individual posters and do not necessarily represent the opinion of Free Republic or its management. All materials posted herein are protected by copyright law and the exemption for fair use of copyrighted works.

Free Republic
Browse · Search
General/Chat
Topics · Post Article

FreeRepublic, LLC, PO BOX 9771, FRESNO, CA 93794
FreeRepublic.com is powered by software copyright 2000-2008 John Robinson