This weekend we had a pumpkin on our front porch (uncarved, the carved one went mushy and got tossed). Two local utes (13 or 14 yrs) decided they were going to smash the pumpkin in the street.
Just as Ute 1 was picking up the pumpkin on my front porch, I opened the door to take my dog (OES) out. Ute 1 dropped the pumpkin and dashed off my porch, down some steps, and into the front yard. Ute 2 and I both stared at the rolling pumpkin rolling towards the steps and in the way of his escape route.
Meanwhile Ute 1 ran at full speed SMACK into a very large pine tree in our front yard, HARD. He staggered there for 5-10 secs and then dropped like a rock.
Ute 2, obviously not a Marine, finally bolted, running right over prone Ute 1.
By then my dog was going nuts from the excitement and I had to push her in the door (she is NOT a guard dog)before I went back outside
Ute 1 was still out cold in front of the tree. He was so still I thought that he might be really hurt and by then I really just wanted him to get up and run away. I simply didn't want a dead guy in my yard.
I stomped down the stairs and yelled at him "hey you" really loud. He then got to his knees, butted the tree again, and staggered off. I could not help laughing my @ss off.
Something about not interfering when your enemy is in the middle of destroying himself...