Posted on 09/30/2005 5:46:55 AM PDT by BJClinton
Hey Naj! Since pissant has been AWOL for a few days, can you start us a T&A thread? Something related to Catherine Zeta Jones would make a good first post.
Aggies do it with fertilizer.
How many Big Ten students does it take to change a light bulb?
At Michigan it takes two. One to change the bulb and one more to explain how they did it every bit as good as an Ivy League school.
At Northwestern it takes four. One to change the bulb, two to place bets on how long it will take, and one to run the book.
At Michigan State it takes four. One to screw in the bulb, and three to figure out how to get high from it.
At Ohio State it takes five. One to change it, two to talk about how Woody would have done it, and two to throw the old bulb at Michigan Students.
At Wisconsin it takes six. One to change it, two to mix the drinks, and three to find the perfect J. Crew outfit to wear for the occasion.
At Illinois it takes seven. One to change it, and six to explain that it glows brighter during basketball season.
At Minnesota it takes twelve. Two to figure out how to screw it in, ten to find an ugly enough lampshade to match the school colors.
At Penn State it takes 100. One to change it, 49 to talk about how they do it better than the rest of the big 10, and 50 to realize it's all a lie.
At Purdue it takes 29,000- What else are they going to do on a Saturday night?
At Iowa it takes none. There is no electricity in Iowa.
Hey, where's Indiana?
I must have gotten this variant from an Indiana page, it seems.
So...
At Indiana, it takes eight. One to change it, and seven to reminisce about how Coach Knight would have done it better.
Or perhaps it was just some lackey teenager being lazy.
Meow, baby.
Sheep shear.
More Looter Guy courtesy of Pookie's Toons.
LOL. I was hoping you'd have The Coach involved. ;-)
!!!!Pharmacology Information (Very Important)!!!!
In Pharmacology all drugs have two names, a trade name and a generic name. For example, the trade name of Tylenol has a generic name of acetaminophen.
Aleve is also called Naproxen. Amoxil is also called Amoxicillin and Motrin is also called Ibuprofen.
The FDA has been looking for a generic name for Viagra. After careful consideration by a team of government experts, it recently announced that it has settled on the generic name of Mycoxafloppin. Also considered were Mycoxafailin, Mydixadrupin, Mydixarizin, Dixafix, and of course, Ibepokin.
In other drug news, Pfizer Corp. announced today that Viagra will soon be available in liquid form and will be marketed by Pepsi Cola as a power beverage suitable for use as a mixer. It will now be possible for a man to literally pour himself a stiff one. Obviously we can no longer call this a soft drink, and it gives new meaning to the names of cocktails, highballs, and just a good old-fashioned stiff drink.
Pepsi will market the new concoction by the name of: Mount & Do.
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