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Stuff You Hate to See
The Morning Paper | 09/19/05 | vanity

Posted on 09/19/2005 7:34:42 AM PDT by genefromjersey

Stories You Hate to Hear

Newport Beach, California : A group of 40 sea lions has been making itself rather unwelcome in this upscale community.

The creatures keep residents awake by barking most of the night. They climb aboard residents’ prized boats : fouling and damaging them. In one case, all 4o climbed aboard a small, pricey sailboat – causing it to sink.

Residents are at their wit’s end , because the sea lions are protected by a 1972 federal law , which says the creatures cannot be killed,harmed, or harassed.

(It is, incidentally, a law Newport Beach residents lobbied for in the late 1960’s and early 1970’s…)

Wellington,NZ: A Green Party legislator – who promised he would run naked through the streets if his rival was elected – says he will keep his promise.

Legislator Keith Locke said he would do “the nude dash” if Rodney Hide won a parliamentary seat in Epsom.

Mr. Hide won by a 3200 vote plurality.

Now Locke says there are certain preparations that have to be made before he keeps his end of the deal. There is body paint, choreography, and artistic effect to be considered. One cannot simply rush into these matters !

Local merchants have expressed a willingness to have a specific street closed off for the event, to arrange for any necessary permissions, and to supply Mr. Locke with a loincloth at the conclusion of his run.

(Perhaps slippers for Mr. Locke’s rapidly cooling feet ? )

Fargo, ND: A man who apparently thought supplying police with a videotape of himself attacking a woman he was told to leave alone would lead to a lifting of the restraining order was proven wrong.

Prosecutors say the man secreted a video camera in the woman’s home,then forced himself upon her.

The video – about half an hour long – includes plain evidence of the woman’s unwillingness, and her struggles with the defendant, according to the prosecutor.

(Everybody wants to be a star … Oh well : Guess this wannabee will soon get a walk-on part in a courtroom production ! )


TOPICS:
KEYWORDS: greens; losers; runner; seals; sex; squeals; videotape
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To: Seruzawa
Good thing for the woman that the guy didn't have a wood schipper

hee hee

21 posted on 09/19/2005 11:12:59 AM PDT by teenyelliott (Soylent green should be made outta liberals...)
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To: jonascord
Wasn't there a story some time back where some California do-gooders found an injured sealion pup, nursed it back to health, and with a deal of media attention, released it back into the wild offshore, only to record it being taken by a Great White, with a splash, a yip, and a burp, before the assembled masses?

Ha! That's awesome!
22 posted on 09/19/2005 11:17:40 AM PDT by Spruce
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To: genefromjersey
Stuff You Hate to See

Hillery in a pantsuit.
Bill Clinton on TV.
Al Gore, any time, any place.
Need I go on?

23 posted on 09/19/2005 11:19:57 AM PDT by cuz_it_aint_their_money (Why does a slight tax increase cost you $200 and a substantial tax cut saves you 30 cents?)
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To: genefromjersey

ear plugs...big mouth...idiot


24 posted on 09/19/2005 12:21:58 PM PDT by laceybrookesdad (A half truth is a whole lie!)
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To: jonascord

I think that was up in the Northwest somewhere. Puget Sound maybe. But the story was true.


25 posted on 09/19/2005 12:37:46 PM PDT by PeteB570
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To: jonascord

IIRC it was an Orca (killer whale). The do-gooders had given the seal a name and there were all these school kids out to watch the release. It was pretty gruesome; I think the whale threw the seal up into the air and then chomped it when it fell back into it's mouth.


26 posted on 09/19/2005 7:02:24 PM PDT by Vor Lady (I'm too young to feel this d*&m old.)
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To: Grannyx4

It was nursed back to health after the Exxon Valdez incident. Marching band, politicians, Sierra Club and PETA on hand to watch nature in action.


27 posted on 09/19/2005 7:07:30 PM PDT by N. Theknow (Deja Pew = We've been through this $hit before)
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To: N. Theknow

It was a sea otter and an orca. Orca tossed it into the air and swallowed it whole when it came back down.


28 posted on 09/19/2005 7:09:38 PM PDT by N. Theknow (Deja Pew = We've been through this $hit before)
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To: genefromjersey

Nothing, I repeat nothing, compares with the enviroweenie mess that masquerades as Canadian geese overrunning office parks here in the northeast. Honk! Splat!


29 posted on 09/19/2005 7:13:51 PM PDT by P.O.E. (.)
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To: COBOL2Java

Newport Beach is/was Chris Cox's (R) power base. I still think it is funny, in a sick sort of way.


30 posted on 09/19/2005 7:24:10 PM PDT by NathanR (Mexico: So far from God; So close to the USA.)
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To: N. Theknow

That's right! Thanks for clarifying it for me. I wasn't sure about it being a seal, but I did remember the video of the whale throwing it up into the air before eating it.
A similar thing happened in Oregon several years ago; a pod of Orca chased a bunch of seals (or sea lions) into Newport Bay. The seals (40-50) kept trying to get out of the bay, but the Orcas wouldn't let them; then with no warning the pod drove the seals toward the wharf/dock area and attacked them. I don't like to see gratuitous slaughter, but it was funny watching the animal lovers freaking out while the whales ripped and shredded the seals apparently for fun. It happened in front of the bay windows of two popular restaurants. Very few if any survived; the bay was a mess until the tide changed.


31 posted on 09/19/2005 7:31:53 PM PDT by Vor Lady (Doesn't expecting the unexpected make the unexpected the expected?)
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To: P.O.E.

You've got THAT right !


32 posted on 09/20/2005 5:38:31 AM PDT by genefromjersey (So much to flame;so little time !)
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