Posted on 08/12/2005 2:56:23 PM PDT by churchillbuff
Remember that old saying, "Where there's smoke, there's fire"? It was especially true at Comedy Central's roast of Pamela Anderson on Sunday. Courtney Love lit up a cigarette before the show began and throughout the taping appeared increasingly toasted. The oft-obscene roast, airing at 10 p.m. Sunday on the cable channel, was hosted by Jimmy Kimmel with guests Bea Arthur, Andy Dick, Anna Nicole Smith and Dennis Rodman.
Love sat on stage, sprawled in a chair, chain-smoking, cursing and flipping the bird as she defended her pal Pam from hilarious insults.
But there were more Love jokes than Anderson cracks. The punk singer/actress recently completed a court-ordered rehab, but no one Sunday night was buying her proclaimed sobriety. For one thing, Tommy Lee, not exactly the poster boy for clean living, is her Alcoholics Anonymous sponsor.
A still-puffing Love took the podium. "I'm a smoker," she admitted. "But I've been clean and sober for a ... year, so all these drug jokes ... jokes are ... " She trailed off, then regained awareness. "Why am I here? Because this counts as three hours of community service, and now I'm almost done."
Then Love got curious about Anderson's implants. "We both had our implants removed. But why did you put yours back? I didn't miss my porno boobs. These are real now. There's just a little silicone at the bottom and the rest is all me. No, really!" She lifted her shirt, baring her white belly roll, then thought better of it. Or maybe she just forgot what she was doing.
Finally, she wrapped it up: "I really love Pam. Other than her hair, her teeth, her breasts and her teeth and, and, and her nails, she's just so ... real." Stumbling to her seat, Love repeated, "And I haven't done drugs for over a year!"
To which Kimmel responded, "I hope that's not true. Because if you're NOT on drugs, you've got real problems."
Well, they could have made Clinton her counselor -- that would have had even less credibility.
She's turning into the "Battlefield Earth" of celebrities.
C'mon. Any article that mentions the VERY SEXY Bea Arthur is begging for pictures to be posted.
Big question is...is she skanky enough?
Sad. But I give minor points to this sorry, egomaniacal lush for her response when Al Gore tried ass-kissing her several years ago by pronouncing himself "a big fan" of her work.
"Name a song," she responded.
He couldn't.
And despite her presence at this roast, I'm positive that Bea Arthur isn't. Like Abe Vigoda and Frank Lautenberg, she walks the earth in limbo, eternally undead.
You know this type of thread doesn't belong in frontpage.
Don't do this again.
Wow. What an 'A' list. [/sarc]
ping
LOL! I always wonder if Courtney remains so messed up because she may have "allegedly" killed Curt?
There goes the needle on the "YIKES!!" meter...
This type of thread doesn't belong anywhere
There's a joke in there somewhere...
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