I'm in fear that I'll resemble the cake. My dress isn't frilly, but it IS white and full-skirted.
I'm just hoping I lose my usual 20 pounds between now (Renfest rehearsal starts this weekend) and then, because my waist will almost disappear. That'll make me a bit less cakelike, I hope.
That's why I am so adamant about not wearing white to weddings. It took me ages to find "the dress" and when I found it, it wasn't available in my size. The dress had to be cut to fit, yadda yadda, all the usual nightmares ensued. What I went through for that dress! And then the nerve of two bimbos, showing up in white. They really were bimbos, I'm not just being mean. One became my sister-in-law. Now she's my ex-sister-in-law. Big ol' bimbo.
You're dead-on right about sending, not carrying the gift. Classy, classy, classy. For prople I don't know too well, I stick to the registry. For people I do know well, I always send a piece of Waterford, whether they like it or not. Having something beautiful to look at (and easy to hock!) in the beginning of a marriage can't hurt, I figure.
You're also right about "Free Bird." Unacceptable under any circumstances. There oughtta be a law!