I guess this answers the question:
Posted on 07/20/2005 2:48:29 AM PDT by KneelBeforeZod
Dissuade your daughter from marrying until she's in her 30s. Once she's been off your payroll for more than a decade, the wedding is on her.
Any self-respecting 30-something woman should be ashamed to ask Mom and Dad to pay for her wedding.
We have GOT to hear this story.
I'm in fear that I'll resemble the cake. My dress isn't frilly, but it IS white and full-skirted.
I'm just hoping I lose my usual 20 pounds between now (Renfest rehearsal starts this weekend) and then, because my waist will almost disappear. That'll make me a bit less cakelike, I hope.
Okay, don't kneel. Sitting instead of kneeling isn't going to attract much attention. What I was trying to say was something like, "Don't act like you're objecting to the religious service, because if you do, you should have declined the invitation."
I guess this answers the question:
If this is the bride, all bets are off:
I'm sure I wouldn't know.
ANYHOW, the bride in this story is Gitana (gypsy) and her family has for generations bred Andalusians in Spain.
She is more at home in a saddle that on the ground. More of a tom-boy than a girlie girl. She didn't want a big wedding, but it was pretty much out of her hands.
Her father was a true "old world" kind of patriarch, so when she became engaged to a US military officer, he was THRILLED! He was VERY impressed with a man in uniform. VERY.
The day of the wedding arrived and so did the dad with the bride's new Trophy Bride who was about 5 years younger than the bride. Important to the story is that bride's Mom had been knocking back drinks all day and wasn't exactly, erm, friendly to start with towards the new 'wife'.
They were also serving a full meal at the wedding, complete with some sharp cutlery.
And in true family tradition, the bride was in a super-duper poofy dress with about 400 yards of fabric in an outdoor wedding in the heat. 
Luckily, she had work some pretty comfy shoes for the event.
The groom of course is in is full dress uniform, looking quite dashing :)
This is starting to sound like "My Big Fat Gitana Wedding".
Anyhow, as soon as the ceremony is over, the father of the bride comes forward with a pair of Andalusians as their wedding gift.
So they can start their own herd in their new life together.
At this point the father of the bride presents the stallion, complete with saddle, to the groom, expecting him to hop up on the back of the horse and ride him around in his resplendent uniform and show off the wonderful gift.
HOWEVER, the last time the groom was on a horse, he had put a quarter in it first.
but he wasn't going to let Dad in law know. But maybe macho pride kept him quite, so he just jumps right up on the back of the horse.
The horse apparently said to himself "Self- I've got an idiot here! Lets have some fun!" So he takes off with the groom, who's now flapping on the back of the horse like laundry in March. The groom finally gets thrown and the horse tries to get in a few choice stomps, grinding groom into the dirt, just so he knows who's boss.
The tom-boy bride is able to run in her poofy dress (thanks to wearing comfy shoes). She saves her new hubby from becoming a grease spot in the grass and manages to get the horse under control.
During all of this, her father is yelling
"WHAT KIND OF MAN CAN'T RIDE A HORSE!" in Gitana.
The groom is yelling "YOUR FATHER TRIED TO KILL ME!" in English.
Trophy Wife makes some snarky remark about how unladylike the bride was running in her dress,
causing the bride's mom to start yelling obscenities Trophy Bride, calling her some choice expletives, while throwing aforementioned sharp cutlery at Trophy wife, with scary precision.
The hot, tired, disgusted Bride stomps off with the horses and spends the rest of the reception smoking cigarettes with her cousins in the stable.
That's why I am so adamant about not wearing white to weddings. It took me ages to find "the dress" and when I found it, it wasn't available in my size. The dress had to be cut to fit, yadda yadda, all the usual nightmares ensued. What I went through for that dress! And then the nerve of two bimbos, showing up in white. They really were bimbos, I'm not just being mean. One became my sister-in-law. Now she's my ex-sister-in-law. Big ol' bimbo.
You're dead-on right about sending, not carrying the gift. Classy, classy, classy. For prople I don't know too well, I stick to the registry. For people I do know well, I always send a piece of Waterford, whether they like it or not. Having something beautiful to look at (and easy to hock!) in the beginning of a marriage can't hurt, I figure.
You're also right about "Free Bird." Unacceptable under any circumstances. There oughtta be a law!
Ack, I'll second that. I was recently at a wedding and nearly injured myself doing the hokey-pokey.
But you can't get rid of the chicken! It's the only dance some of us know how to do!
how about "gimme 3 steps?"
PLEASE, if you want people to dress informally, note it somewhere in the directions or something!
My husband and I were recently invited to a wedding reception (the wedding was held in another state). My husband knows the people through work and never could get a coherent answer about appropriate attire. All I knew was "not formal". I wore nice, light dress pants, blouse and heels.
The party was at a park shelter. Most guests wore shorts, and t-shirts. I felt foolish, and that is not a nice way to treat your guests!
LOL! I have a question that I'm sure you ladies know the answer to...is it inappropriate for the mother of the groom to wear the same color as the wedding party?
My MIL did this and I thought it was so odd.
Children and guests should not be brought to a wedding unless their names or the word "guest" are on the invitation card.
Best wedding gift--good ol' American greenbacks, tucked in a card.
That's a tough one. I'm just thinking of my own wedding. I figured, I'm only going to do this once and it's going to be traditional, so like a good bride I chose some traditionally awful bridesmaid dresses. If my MIL showed up in really bright emerald green, I would have known she was trying to make a point. Was the predominant color of your wedding party distinctive?
Me, I just plain don't like Skynyrd. I think they were overrated, and they're not on my playlist. Now, if the Guy adds a song or two, there's nothing I can do about that . . . but it will NOT be "Free Bird."
Or "That Smell."
I wouldn't call it inappropriate, per se, but I totally concur with your judgement of oddness. I'd think the MOB would want to stand out.
But then, my mother-in-law-to-be remarried in January, and wore red. You just gotta like that!
"And guest" is inappropriate. See my #39 above.
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