Somewhat teasing of course. All of these would fail the sofa test resoundingly.
I've never understood what people see in picasso. The guy had to be stoned to paint so poorly. The pictures aren't even interesting. (You want perspective, see Escher (Hope I got his name right))
I have test to tell whether art is great, sort of like your sofa test.
In 1000 years, when archaeologists dig it up, will they know it was great art?