To All *Freepers* The BEST date you have ever been on!

my head | 06/16/05 | Dasher

[Dashing Dasher]

Now that we have heard many of your WORST date stories, let's turn the tables and tell about the BEST dates.

[Finger Monkey]

Oh, Homer, your are so cute.

[cyborg]

thanks :-)

[Dashing Dasher]

Hey handsome....

I wanted to ask you why you don't name your dead geese?

[Dashing Dasher]

I'd party with you two anytime!

[najida]

And? And!!!

What happened next?

The next six months were some,
No, they were the BEST 6 months of my life.
I was in love with my best friend,
I went from believing I was the most evil, wicked,
fat, ugly, stupid, sinful, bad, rotten, unlovable, etc
(you get the picture)
Person on the planet to a perfectly normal human capable of loving and being loved.

T'was a good thing, even when it ended.

[teenyelliott]

Oh, no. Bertha and I went through the date the dumb and beautiful stage. They were fun to look at, but what . . a wate . . of time!!!

[Oberon]

To Dashing Dasher, courtesy of Julie Brown. I used to have the album on vinyl, of all things. It's from "Goddess in Progress":

Big and Stupid

When I need somethin' to help me unwind
I find a six foot baby with a one track mind
Smart guys are nowhere, they make demands
Give me a moron with talented hands
I go bar-hopping and they say last call
I start shopping for a Neanderthal

The bigger they come the harder I fall
In love 'til we're done then they're out in the hall

{Refrain}
I like 'em big and stupid
I like 'em big and real dumb
I like 'em big and stupid

What kind of guy does a lot for me?
A Superman with a lobotomy
My father's outa Harvard
My brother's outa Yale
But the guy I took home last night
Just got outa jail

The way he grabbed and threw me, ooh it really got me hot
But the way he growled and bit me, I hope he had his shots

The bigger they are the harder they'll work
I got a soft spot for a good lookin' jerk

{Refrain}

I met a guy, who drives a truck
He can't tell time but he sure can drive
I asked his name and he had to think
Could I have found the missing link
He's so stupid you know what he said
Well I forgot what he said, 'cause it was so stupid

The bigger they come the harder I fall
In love 'til we're done then they're out in the hall

{Refrain}

I like 'em big and real dumb
I like 'em big and

[cyborg]

Yup good news for my mom. She was being to whisper the word 'spinster'.

[teenyelliott]

add an s to that wate, dum dum.

[cowboyway]

If you think you are going to hang out and issue pet names to each other, you've got another thing comin sister.

Just call me Stud Muffin, big boy.

[Dashing Dasher]

I have that CD.


;-)

[najida]

Well,
they say abortion wrecks lives,
and his drinking hinged being unable to forgive himself for being part of one happening (long, twisted, ugly story).

Plus, his ex-wife was a wackaloon witch with the personality of a rabid rat on acid. And she looked like one too :)

Who was a emotional trainwreck (in front of him) and kept the guilty fires burning. Can we say passive aggressive boys and girls.

[Dashing Dasher]

BERTHADEE!!!!

Your beau is flirting with Carolina (again!)

[AppyPappy]

He snores. It was so loud, it drowned out my snoring. Almost..

[Oberon]

Now I bet it won't be another month before she wants you and Petro to marry and start breeding like bunnies. Moms like grandchildren, you know. =]

[Finger Monkey]

I don't consider them (well, most of them) a waste of time, but a tempering of the steel that become my desire for the man I have now found.

[cowboyway]

I wanted to ask you why you don't name your dead geese?

I don't name things that I plan to eat......hmmmm....with certain exceptions.

[meowmeow]

...and we got married on the 4th of July so there would always be fireworks.

Plus I was a lazy bride so it ensured that I only had to buy a white dress and some hamburgers for the grill :)

[Finger Monkey]

It's disgusting. Carolina has been in love with him since before I was (officially). Teeny's pretty googie about him, too.

I keep telling them he's mine. Could be a family feud . . .

[Finger Monkey]

You are my, ahem, stud muffin.

oy.