Why It's Great to be a Woman

JokesOnline ^ | 12/04 | staff

[patton]

Close. I wore them at work, today.

I am a mathematician. ;)

[Modernman]

Do you need a reading? What kind of shoes do you have on?

Black square-toed Kenneth Cole lace-ups.

[najida]

I'm wearing Butter Ferragamo mules with Beryl kitten heels, a woven to the front cream bow and top stitching around the toe. :)

[Auntbee]

I fall in that category.

[patton]

What? What language was that?

I gave my best employee a 42% raise this year - she screamed something about guilt-free shoes, and ran out the door.

When she cam back, she had something on her feet. That was all I cared about.

[teenyelliott]

Okay, before everyone thinks I am Cleo the internet psychic (and probably as accurate), let me add a couple of things to my original statement.

In order to size up a person based on their shoes, you have to have a visual of the whole person, as well as knowledge of the specific environment in which they are worn.

Come on, people, this is science!

[pissant]

Being a woman? Or wearing socks at work?

[normy]

I really have to watch where I go with my friends nowadays because the 30+ women are so freakin desperate. It doesn't matter if your wearing a ring they will try to seduce you, its pretty pathetic.

Oh and a group men can sit together at a bar or dinner and not speak of women once.

[Auntbee]

Both, plus 25-50, unmarried and a conservative.

[Auntbee]

I hear ya. I went out with two single women friends of mine (I'm single, too) and all they could talk about was finding a man. Geez, all I wanted to do was have a drink. If this is what single women over 45 and unmarried talk about all the time I'll just stay home and rent a movie and buy a six pack.

[pissant]

Got it. Well I knew there was a reason I always liked having you on my threads!!!

[pissant]

I've never had a drink with the fellers where we didn't at least didn't size up the help (waitresses and bartenders).

[teenyelliott]

Well, you must do something interesting to get them muddy. And if you wore them to work, you must be the boss. If that is the case, I bet you are really easy to work for, and a very nice guy.

[patton]

Blue jeans. White oxford. Old sweater, with holes in the elbows. Beard (red), unkempt hair (some other color, no one can put a name to).

Come to think of it, I look like the unibomber.

[teenyelliott]

man - Why did God make women so beautiful, yet so stupid?

woman - He made us beautiful so that you would be attracted to us. He made us stupid so that we would be attracted to you.

[teenyelliott]

I love lamp.

[patton]

You are better at this than I would have guessed.

I expected, "Cheap shoes, unkempt, loser."

Looks like my disguise is worthless.

[infidel29]

For whom? It can't be because they're soooo comfortable.

[pissant]

To which post are you replying?

[teenyelliott]

Come to think of it, I look like the unibomber.

Sounds to me like you look like a liberal professor. ;)