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*** OFFICIAL FRIDAY SILLINESS THREAD ***
3/4/05 | TheBigB

Posted on 03/04/2005 9:02:18 AM PST by TheBigB

Woo Hoo! TGIF! Time for some FRIDAAAAAAY SILLINESS!! :^) Let loose and blow off some steam...post silly pics, jokes, nonsensical statements, or even IGNORE THIS THREAD!

"Silliness, sweeeet!"

An actual book about pet care. I swear!

It's not Christmas, but still...

Fierce Allegiance says he never listened to that Debbie Gibson tape in his truck. I don't believe him. :^)


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To: TheBigB

Two old ladies were sitting on a park bench outside the local Town Hall where a flower show was in progress. The thin one leaned over and said, "Life is so darned boring.We never have any fun anymore. For $5.00, I'd take my clothes off and streak through that stupid flower show!"

"You're on!" said the other old lady, holding up a $5.00 bill.

As fast as she could, the first old lady fumbled her way out of her clothes and, completely naked, streaked through the front door of the flower show.

Waiting outside, her friend soon heard a huge commotion inside the hall, followed by loud applause. The smiling and naked old lady burst out through the door surrounded by a cheering crowd.

"What happened?" asked her waiting friend.

"I won 1st prize as Best Dried Arrangement."



The health minister is visiting a psychiatric ward. He asks
the head of psychology "How do you determine if a patient is
cured."

The psychologist explains. "We take them to the bathtub,
which is filled with water, hand them a spoon and a cup and
ask them to empty the bathtub."

"I see," says the health minister, "the cured person would
choose the cup because it`s bigger, and would empty the tub
faster".

"Actually no," replies the psychologist, "a normal person
would simply pull the plug".


61 posted on 03/04/2005 9:56:07 AM PST by lilylangtree (Veni, Vidi, Vici)
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To: ArGee
Likewise, a bottle of wine doesn't care if you pick up your socks off before you go to bed.
62 posted on 03/04/2005 10:00:46 AM PST by hoosier_RW_conspirator ("Our inventories are steeped in capability." -- AVatian)
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To: hoosier_RW_conspirator

So I take it you can't help me sleep in the bed tonight?

Why IS a woman better than a bottle of fine wine?

Doesn't ANYBODY know?

Shalom.


63 posted on 03/04/2005 10:02:52 AM PST by ArGee (Why do we let queers tell us what's normal?)
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To: TheBigB

You never know what will happen if you get to wish !!




Cinderella is now 95 years old. After a fulfilling life with the now dead prince, she happily sits upon her rocking chair, watching the world go by from her front porch, with a cat named Bob for companionship.

One sunny afternoon out of nowhere, appeared the fairy godmother.
Cinderella said, "Fairy Godmother, what are you doing here after all these years"?

The fairy godmother replied, "Cinderella, you have lived an exemplary life since I last saw you. Is there anything for which your heart still yearns?"

Cinderella was taken aback, overjoyed, and after some thoughtful consideration, she uttered her first wish: "The prince was wonderful, but not much of an investor. I'm living hand to mouth on my disability checks, and I wish I were wealthy beyond comprehension.

Instantly her rocking chair turned into solid gold.
Cinderella said, "Ooh, thank you, Fairy Godmother".

The fairy godmother replied "it is the least that I can do. What do you want for your second wish?"

Cinderella looked down at her frail body, and said, "I wish I were young and full of the beauty and youth I once had."

At once, her wish became reality, and her beautiful young visage returned. Cinderella felt stirrings inside of her that had been dormant for years.

And then the fairy godmother spoke once more: "You have one more wish; what shall it be?"

Cinderella looks over to the frightened cat in the corner and says, "I wish for you to transform Bob, my old cat, into a kind and handsome young man."

Magically, Bob suddenly underwent so fundamental a change in his biological make-up that, when he stood before her, he was a man so beautiful the likes of him neither she nor the world had ever seen.

The fairy godmother said, "Congratulations, Cinderella, enjoy your new life. With a blazing shock of bright blue electricity, the fairy godmother was gone as suddenly as she appeared.

For a few eerie moments, Bob and Cinderella looked into each other's eyes. Cinderella sat, breathless, gazing at the most beautiful, stunningly perfect man she had ever seen.


Then Bob walked over to Cinderella, who sat transfixed in her rocking chair, & held her close in his young muscular arms. He leaned in close, blowing her golden hair with his warm breath as he whispered..........

"Bet you're sorry you neutered me."


64 posted on 03/04/2005 10:04:03 AM PST by fredhead ("It is a good thing war is so terrible, or we should grow too fond of it." General Robert E. Lee)
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To: TheBigB
Martha Stewart's got a new magazine coming out:

MARTHA STEWART'S CONFINED LIVING!.......

65 posted on 03/04/2005 10:05:15 AM PST by Red Badger (The South seceded over refusal to end slavery. Blue states want to secede for the same reason......)
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To: ArGee

Well, I could hazard a guess, but it'd likely get me banned!


66 posted on 03/04/2005 10:05:18 AM PST by hoosier_RW_conspirator ("Our inventories are steeped in capability." -- AVatian)
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To: ArGee

Uhhh...dust and cobwebs don't tend to accumulate on women, and you needn't rotate women in the rack every three months?


67 posted on 03/04/2005 10:05:54 AM PST by TrueKnightGalahad (It is only with the heart that one can see rightly. What is essential is invisible to the eye. A S-E)
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To: ArGee; All
.......IIRC we were a silly bunch.

Yes. LOL
There was a lot of silliness but we had a very serious side too. We had a lot of fun.

BRAAD may well be gone but we will always remember it.

68 posted on 03/04/2005 10:07:36 AM PST by Fiddlstix (This Tagline for sale. (Presented by TagLines R US))
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To: TrueKnightGalahad
OK, everyone, picture this. I come home tonight. My wife sweetly asks, "OK, honey, why am I better than a bottle of fine wine?" I'm already nervious because of this mess I've gotten myself into and I stammer a bit and come out with TrueKnightGalahad's suggestion.

Uhhh...dust and cobwebs don't tend to accumulate on women, and you needn't rotate women in the rack every three months?

Do I need to paint a picture, here?

;)

Shalom.

69 posted on 03/04/2005 10:08:16 AM PST by ArGee (Why do we let queers tell us what's normal?)
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To: lilylangtree

Roses & Hanging Baskets

A teenage granddaughter comes downstairs for her date with this see-through blouse on and no bra. Her grandmother just pitched a fit, telling her not to dare go out like that!

The teenager tells her "Loosen up Grams. These are modern times. You gotta let your rose buds show!" and out she goes.

The next day the teenager comes down stairs, and the grandmother is sitting there with no top on. The teenager wants to die. She explains to her grandmother that she has friends coming over and that it is just not appropriate...

The grandmother says, "Loosen up, Sweetie. If you can show off your rose buds, then I can display my hanging baskets.


70 posted on 03/04/2005 10:08:18 AM PST by llevrok (Don't blame me! I voted for Pedro.)
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To: beachn4fun

man, that little bear is so cute.


71 posted on 03/04/2005 10:11:35 AM PST by Finger Monkey (H.R. 25, Fair Tax Act - do the research, contact your legislators, get this puppy passed.)
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To: beachn4fun
I posted here, but didn't ping anyone. I had to run some errands.
72 posted on 03/04/2005 10:14:38 AM PST by Arrowhead1952 ("I hate the Republicans and everything they stand for," - Howard Dean 01/29/2005)
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To: BerthaDee

Err....I taut it wad a puddy tat.


73 posted on 03/04/2005 10:14:48 AM PST by AnOldCowhand (The west is dead. You may lose a sweetheart, but you will never forget her - Charles Russell)
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To: Fierce Allegiance

ROTFL!


74 posted on 03/04/2005 10:15:33 AM PST by TheBigB ("Send lawyers, guns and money; the s*it has hit the fan" ~Warren Zevon)
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To: TrueKnightGalahad

"and you needn't rotate women in the rack every three months?"

What's wrong mixing it up every once in awhile? lol


75 posted on 03/04/2005 10:15:48 AM PST by JimWforBush
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To: TheBigB
Drudge has this caption...

Teacher admits sex with 5 students...

Posted under this picture...

Which begs the question...

Just why are we paying tax dollars for public schools? How much more stupid could those students be?

Shalom.

76 posted on 03/04/2005 10:16:37 AM PST by ArGee (Why do we let queers tell us what's normal?)
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To: ArGee

Blind kids need schooling too!


77 posted on 03/04/2005 10:18:40 AM PST by TheBigB ("Send lawyers, guns and money; the s*it has hit the fan" ~Warren Zevon)
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To: TheBigB

headlinehumor.com

Shalom.

78 posted on 03/04/2005 10:20:34 AM PST by ArGee (Why do we let queers tell us what's normal?)
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To: ArGee
Teacher admits sex with 5 students...

You gotta be joking.... With looks like that, those kids HAD to be at a blind school.

79 posted on 03/04/2005 10:21:32 AM PST by Arrowhead1952 ("I hate the Republicans and everything they stand for," - Howard Dean 01/29/2005)
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To: TheBigB

headlinehumour.com

Shalom.

80 posted on 03/04/2005 10:21:49 AM PST by ArGee (Why do we let queers tell us what's normal?)
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