Posted on 03/04/2005 6:05:40 AM PST by pissant
I hope someone shows Maureen Dowd this article. Might shut her up for a day or two.
He also forgot one other attraction..they usually can't/won't get preggers..
I hope someone shows Maureen Dowd this article. Might shut her up for a day or two.This article is about older women, not bitter old harpies.
Zoinks!
Had it been my friends making this remark continually, they'd have been doing it through missing teeth and bloody noses.
Dowd's a hag, but given her near weekly screeds about how unfair it is that men (that is to say, Michael Douglas) prefer beautiful young women (that is to say, Catherine Zeta Jones) to bitter old harpies (that is to say, Dowd) maybe this article would fool her into taking a few weeks off to hit FL for Spring Break.
LOL. You usually did not say that to your buddy whose mom you're eyeballin'. You discussed it with your other buddies out of his earshot.
My wife is quite a bit older than me, but what attracted me to her was her money! ;-)
Stacy's mom?
Ping without comment...
:p
"Stacy's mom?"
_______________________________________
Is she one of our freeperettes?
In other words he is still too young himself to have a clue.
A rich woman can be just as nice as a poor woman!
"I've already told my wife that I'm trading her in for two 25's when she turns 50."
_______________________________________
Unfortunately, young womens' attraction to older men has to do with the bulge in back of your pants. When they realize you'll be paying the ex 60% of all you make, they won't be interested.
Ben Franklin's Advice Concerning His Friend's Sexual Affairs
Franklin had a friend who did not want to get married, but was battling with urges and lustful inclinations for the opposite sex. In the letter which follows, Franklin first advises the friend that the best solution for his urges is marriage. However, since he knows the friend will not take that advice, Franklin goes on to suggest that his friend have sexual affairs with old women. We know from the context that he is suggesting women over 45 years of age (see #3). His words about putting a basket over her head or turning out the light (see #5) illustrate an aspect of Franklin's character which is seldom exposed.
June 25, 1745
My dear Friend,
I know of no Medicine fit to diminish the violent natural Inclinations you mention; and if I did, I think I should not communicate it to you. Marriage is the proper Remedy. It is the most natural State of Man, and therefore the State in which you are most likely to find solid Happiness. You Reasons against entering into it at present, appear to me not well-founded. The circumstantial Advantages you have in View by postponing it, are not only uncertain, by they are small in comparison with that of the Thing itself, the being married and settled. It is the Man and Woman united that make the compleat human Being. Separate, she wants his Force of Body and Strength of Reason; he, her Softness, Sensibility and acute Discernment. Together they are more likely to succeed in the World. A single Man has not nearly the Value he would have in that State of Union. He is an incomplete Animal. He resembles the odd half of a Pair of Scissars. If you get a prudent healthy Wife, your Industry in your Profession, with her good Oeconomy, will be a Fortune sufficient.
But if you will not take this Counsel, and persist in thinking a Commerce with the Sex inevitable, then I repeat my former Advice, that in all your Amours you should prefer old Women to young ones. You call this a Paradox, and demand my Reasons. They are these:
1. Because as they have more Knowledge of the World and their Minds are better stor'd with Observations, their Conversation is more improving and more lastingly agreable.
2. Because when Women cease to be handsome, the study to be good. To maintain their Influence over Men, they supply the Dimunition of Beauty by the Augmentation of Utility. They learn to do 1000 Services small and great, and are the most tender and useful of all Friends when you are sick. Thus they continue amiable. And hence there is hardly such thing to be found as an old Woman who is not a good Woman.
3. Because there is no hazard of Children, which irregularly produc'd may be attended with much Inconvenience.
4. Because thro' more Experience, they are more prudent and discreet in conducting and Intrigue to prevent Suspicion. The Commerce with them is therefore safer with regard to your Reputation. And with regard to theirs, if the Affair should happen to be known, considerate People might be rather inclin'd to excuse an old Woman who would kindly take care of a young Man, form his Manners by her good Counsels, and prevent his ruining his Health and Fortune among mercenary Prostitutes.
5. Because in every animal that walks upright, the Deficiency of the Fluids that fill the Muscles appears first in the highest Part: the Face first grows lank and wrinkled; then the Neck; then the Breast and Arms; the lower Parts continuing to the last as plump as ever: So that covering all above with a Basket, and regarding only what is below the Girdle, it is impossible of two Women to know an old from a young one. And as in the dark all Cats are grey, the Pleasure of corporal Enjoyment with an Old Woman is at least equal, and frequently superior, every Knack being by Practice capable of Improvement.
6. Because the Sin is less. The debauching of a Virgin may be her Ruin, and make her for Life unhappy.
7. Because the Compunction is less. The having made a young Girl miserable may give you frequent bitter Reflections; none of which can attend the making an old Woman happy.
8. They are so grateful!!
Thus much for my Paradox. But still I advise you to marry directly; being sincerely Your affectionate Friend,
Benjamin Franklin.
She's got it goin' on...
Ben Franklin. The wisest of the wise.
Disclaimer: Opinions posted on Free Republic are those of the individual posters and do not necessarily represent the opinion of Free Republic or its management. All materials posted herein are protected by copyright law and the exemption for fair use of copyrighted works.