Will they go to Machu Pichu this week? Cuzco is the gateway to Machu Pichu, one of the top tourist destinations in the world. If we don't get to see it, I'll be really disappointed and wonder whether Peruvian authorities nixed it.
Quick recap of lap one of the race
In a nice touch and obvious salute to Ron, the Iraq POW, the eleven teams flew by helicopter to the harbor at Long Beach, California, where host Phil Keoghan welcomed them to the starting line of THE AMAZING RACE.
At the signal, teams raced to cars in the parking lot where they found their clue directing them to fly to Lima, Peru. Rob and Amber, Survivor All-Star winners, could not figure out how to open the trunk of their car and were left on the dust as the other teams swiftly drove off to LAX, a quick jaunt by freeway.
On the way to the airport, Megan and Heidi came within inches of a crash. (This gave me fits as I’d opined here prior to the race that they looked like an accident waiting to happen. Didn’t mean it literally, ladies. ) After the usual scuffle at the airport, teams got on one of two planes that landed in Lima 90 minutes apart. From there, they were to go to the Plaza de Armas to find the next clue.
Debbie and Bianca, who had working knowledge of Spanish, teamed up with Susan and Patrick, who had a cell phone, and quickly found the bus to Ancon, where they would find their next clue. Whiny Patrick, the gay son, says, “Rob is dumb as a stump, teehee.”(Riiiiight, so dumb that he engineered a $1.1 million Survivor win for himself and fiancé Amber.)
Meanwhile, the rest of the teams on the first plane wandered around the Plaza de Armas wondering how to communicate with the natives and find the bus. They were still milling about looking lost and foolish when the second plane landed. At the airport, Rob and Amber got a lucky break when they were recognized by an American in customs who showed them to the fast bus to the Plaza and then on to the express bus to Ancon, thus bumping them from last place to third.
At Ancon, racers took bicycle rickshaws down the coast to Playa Hermosa to dig through one of three sand piles for their next clue., each pile marked with the time their plane would leave: 6 a.m., 7 a.m and 7:40 a.m. Riding along in the rickshaw, Debbie and Bianca get all touchy-feely, giggle and say “Te Amo,” leading to viewer speculation about the true nature of their friendly relationship. They arrive at the beach first followed by Susan & Patrick. . A nice visual moment occurred when overweight Ryan and Chuck traded places with their skinny driver and ran along pulling the rickshaw..
Debbie and Bianca and Susan and Patrick were amazed to see Romber arrive in third place. When the next wave of racers arrived, D&B directed POW Ron and Kelly away from the 7 a.m. pile to the 7:40 pile, thus revealing themselves as rotten, lying, and conniving, a team not to be trusted. (And possibly as MoveOn members who’d do anything to stop a serviceman from winning anything?)
Next morning, after a night camping on the beach, teams head for Cuzco on one of three planes. After the 6 am plane leaves, they learn that the 7 am plane has mechanical problems so everyone now piles into the 7:40. Lucky break for Ron & Kelly who are no longer relegated to the back of the pack.
At Cuzco, D&B, P&S, and Romber, in that order, find their clues directing them to a gorge where fun and exciting ziplines deposit them at the next clue, followed a couple of hours later by the rest of the racers. No one has a problem with the ziplines.
At the bottom of the gorge, they run into a detour and are given a choice of “Rope a Llama” and “Rope a Basket.” To get their next clue, teams must herd two llamas into a pen or carry 35-pound baskets of alfalfa 2/3 of a mile dressed in colorful Andean hats and ponchos that all Americans look ridiculous wearing Rob and Amber carry baskets with no problem. D&B start out with llamas, but can’t make the things behave and switch to baskets. S&P herd llamas and stick with it in spite of uncooperative beasties who battle them every inch of the way. As the rest of the teams perform these tasks, it’s particularly interesting to see Meredith and Gretchen, the pleasant older couple, having no problem with their docile llamas, and perplexing to see strong husky Ryan and Chuck choosing llamas over the faster baskets, an error in judgment, imo, they will pay for dearly.
Teams now find the Huambutio Police Station where they climb into delivery trucks departing every 20 minutes for the town of Pisac where they will find their next clue in the outdoor market. Rob and Amber make the first truck, which isn't scheduled to leave yet, allowing Susan & Patrick to climb on at the last minute. Patrick offers faux friendship to Romber, and they work together to find the clue.
He explains later in one of those on-camera asides, “We have every intention of aligning with Rob & Amber only to set the trap, because we would love to be personally responsible for their disposal in this Race.”
D&B make the second truck and find their clue in the marketplace almost instantly, again thanks to their knowledge of Spanish, thus bringing them into contention for first with S&P and Romber. The three teams are now neck in neck, giving us a great TAR moment! They race by taxi back to the finish line at La Merced, a 325-year old church in Cuzco.
Romber’s cab encounters blocked traffic, so Rob gets out and helps push the offending broken-down van out of the way, but not quickly enough to get to the finish line first.
D&B arrive first and each win $10,000 for their win, S&P are second and Romber settles for third. Phil congratulates them for coming from last place to third.
The rest of the teams straggle in, with another breathtaking race to the finish by the final three teams. Sadly, Ryan and Chuck, the country boys from South Carolina, are last to arrive and are eliminated.
In order of arrival:
1. Debbie and Bianca 2. Susan and Patrick 3. Rob and Amb er 4. Brian and Greg, the surfer dudes 5. Lynn and Alex, the gay boys 6. Meredith and Gretch, the older couple 7. Ray and Deana, the dating couple 8. Uchenna & Joyce, the childless couple 9. Megan and Heidi, the Hair Queens 10. Ron and Kelly, POW and Beauty queen 11. Ryan and Chuck.
Veto!s Unsolicited Opinions:
Biggest Surprise: Lynn and Alex put the “gay” back in gay couple and (so far) are fun to watch. (Unlike Reichen and Chip who were, imo, self-righteous, condescending, sniffy, mirror-gazing, broomstick-up-the–backside creeps.)
Greatest Disappointment: Our POW and girlfriend, Ron and Kelly, are not looking too swift. I hope they pick up the pace.
Libdar Siren Off The Charts: Susan and Patrick. Definitely Kerry voters. Sayonara, please, and soon.
Most Fun Moment: Displaying uncanny political savvy, Hispanic Republican llamas spit again and again at Susan and Patrick. Way to go, wild thangs!
Thing that Made You Go Hmmmmmm Was it just a little too convenient that Romber got all that help at the Lima airport from an American who just happened to have time to squire them to the express bus and beyond? Romber is, after all, a big incentive for better-rated Survivor watchers to come over to TAR.
The Team to Watch: Bianca and Debbie are good at this racing business. And underhanded, nasty and so vicious I have nicked them Viciousistahs. Possible MoveOn members, as I mentioned above. They could make it to the end, though they won’t make friends along the way. They won’t care, because after all, they have each other. Barfola to that but a certain admiration for their abilities.
Other Team to Watch: The surprisingly laid back surfer brothers Brian and Greg don't seem to be working very hard so far, still came in fourth. If they step it up, they could be serious contendahs. Will their need to be cool trump their desire to win a million bucks?
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