Posted on 12/03/2004 5:07:04 AM PST by KidGlock
Who Wears the Wrong Size Condom?
Thu Dec 2, 8:51 AM ET Reuters
BERLIN (Reuters) - Most German men wear condoms of the wrong size, a condom distributor said on Wednesday, after asking more than 2,500 men to measure their erect penis.
"People measure their feet when they buy shoes. Why shouldn't they measure their penises? A man would not wear children's shoes," said Jan Vinzenz Krause of Vinico, which released the study's findings on World AIDS (news - web sites) Day.
Most condom boxes in Germany indicated size but men, due to embarrassment or vanity, rarely checked or just bought those marked "extra large," he said.
Vinico's survey recommended various brands to be used -- depending on the endowment of the wearer.
The study found the average erect penis size was 14.7 cm (5-3/4 inches), with 40 percent of participants reporting lengths between 12 and 15 cm (4-3/4 and 5-7/8 inches).
When compared with the condoms normally used by the participants, the results showed only 18 percent wore the right size, with nearly half squeezing into condoms that were too small and 34 percent trying to use those that were too big.
"The study found the average erect penis size was 14.7 cm (5-3/4 inches), with 40 percent of participants reporting lengths between 12 and 15 cm (4-3/4 and 5-7/8 inches)."
Is that real inches or AOL inches?
I get them for free when I buy one of those 18 inch pencils with Homer Simpson's head on the end.
Hey man, I got 12 inches.
I just have to make two trips.
"Pharmacist, please give me a packet of your largest condoms. Oh yeah, I also need some rubber bands...."
Another one. Why are most women so bad at telling distance?
Because they’re told that this [holding thumb and forefinger up 4 inches apart] is 10 inches.
OOOOF.
First time I ever bought them, they were behind the counter at the register. "Can I have some Trojans?"
"What?"
"Trojans."
"OH, condoms!" The clerk goes to get them. I turn around. Three nuns, in full habits, are standing in line behind me, giving me the tsk tsk look.
This also reminds me of another cold war era joke where the Soviets order a bunch of 14" long condoms from an American manufacturer who send the shipment in packages marked "medium."
I've got one better.
My wife sends me out to buy tampons. I get up to the register, and the clerk can't find the price.
She says, "Pharmacy, we need a price check in line one on some tampons."
Since then, I build a pole barn and stocked it with enough tampons to supply any women's college for 100 years.
Obviously, you've never been to Texas.
:)
...So the boy says to the pharmacist, "I would like to purchase some condoms."
"That'll be $13.80 with Tax."
Says the lad, "Oh...so that's how you hold them on!" :0
Ouch!
Remember in the movie "Little Darlings" when the girls, led by Kristy McNichol broke into the gas station men's room and stole the condom machine? LOL
There once was a young man from Kent
Whose d*** was so long that it bent
To save him some trouble
He folded it double
And instead of coming he went.
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