I think from reading some of the comments, it has been a while since some of you had children in school. Schools have become a mine field for officials, teachers, parents and children. It is sad but true, everyone is so CYA and PC it makes for almost an adverse relationship at times.
When my oldest (now 23) started school, I tried to deal with the school as my mother had, let them make and enforce the rules and teach my children to respect and follow them.
I even signed a form allowing them to spank my daughter if they deemed necessary.
I soon realized that common sense does not exist in most school officials and they are extremely unfair about dealing with children, using the children against each other and over reacting to normal childhood behavior.
I made a decision to no longer sign the corporal punishment form, and made it plain to the school officials that if an incident involved a child of mine- I needed to be contacted and present before any questioning would take place. I know to some of you it sounds bizarre that a parent would require this for a simple visit to the office- but trust me
it is better safe than sorry when dealing with the school officials.
It is truly sad that it has come to this, I don't know what can be done to make it better on every one. I also would like to add that I have been rarely called to school, I think only 4 or 5 times with 3 children in school over the last 15+ years. When I am called I listen to the entire story from the officials, then I speak to my child in private and get their side of the story. I then decide what I think about the situation, and what I will and won't go along with. I have sided with the officials on more than one occasion, but they know I will let them know if I don't agree. Sometimes we agree to disagree and the school does what they decide and I explain to the child I feel it is wrong and why.
At least in our school system, if the officials know you will call BS on them if they get "too out there" then you will get less BS to begin with. The officials also know I will back them up when my children are in the wrong, I think that is the key to getting along without letting them take advantage.
HMM. It has been awhile but I refused to allow corporal punishment for one of my sons for something outrageous he did. The principal called and asked me if he could give him 3 pops. I told him no and he asked me why. I replied that all he was going to do was make him mad and I was on my way up there because I wanted to do it myself. When I got there the principal assured me that, that was ok and that they had worked things out:')