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LOL! I love it! My husband is a band director.

well in that case..........
>(the first one's even about baseball

Q: What's the difference between an oboe and a bassoon?
A: You can hit a baseball further with a bassoon.

A young child says to his mother, "Mom, when I grow up I think I'd like to be a musician." She replies, "Well honey, you know you can't do both."

Q: What do you call a beautiful woman on a trombonist's arm?
A: A tattoo.

Q: What do you call a drummer in a three-piece suit?
A: "The Defendant"

Q: What's the difference between a guitar player and a large pizza?
A: A large pizza can feed a family of four.

Q: What do you call a guitar player that only knows two chords?
A: A music critic.

Q: How do you keep your violin from being stolen?
A: Put it in a viola case.

Q: What will you never say about a banjo player?
A: That's the banjo player's Porsche.

Q: Why are violist's fingers like lightning?
A: They rarely strike the same spot twice.

Tuba Player: "Did you hear my last recital?"
Friend: "I hope so."

Relative minor: A guitarist's girlfriend.

Female vocalist asks her keyboard player, "I'd like to do 'My Funny Valentine' again tonight... but can you think of a way to 'jazz' it up?"
Keyboard player replies, "Sure, we can do the first chorus in G minor, then modulate to G# minor for the second chorus in 5/4 time, then modulate to A minor in 3/4 time for the bridge, then cut off the last 3 bars!"
She exclaims, "that might be too complicated to do without a rehearsal!"
Keyboard player responds, "Well, that's how you did it last night!"