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Posted on 02/10/2004 3:46:22 PM PST by martin_fierro
Cigar story sends readers up in smoke
By Jim Pettit
Staff columnist
A maxim is defined as a general expression of truth or principle.
For example, a popular maxim tells us the early bird catches the worm.
But what happens if the worm is late? Wouldn't it be more accurate to say that the early bird catches the early worm?
That's the problem with maxims. There is always a catch.
Rudyard Kipling's observation - a maxim to some - that ''a woman is only a woman, but a good cigar is a smoke'' also comes to mind.
But how pleasant is a cigar if a woman, tired of being ignored, drops an anvil on Smokin' Joe's head?
I don't know if it qualifies as a maxim, but write it down: Cigar smokers, like women, are not to be agitated. More on that later.
I come to the office often on weekends. It's quiet and there are few distractions. I catch up on e-mail and other correspondence. I scan news wires for oddities that might become column fodder.
Wonder of e-mail
I love e-mail, which is a great technological advancement.
I still feel a sense of wonder when receiving a message from someone on the West Coast or from a foreign country such as England or New Jersey. Just think, a reply is only a few keyboard strokes away.
Yes, there are abuses. What started as a trickle of useless information, dubbed spam, is now a roaring flood.
Here at work, it's not as bad as it used to be.
Most companies have little computerized traffic cops that identify spam as it comes in and reroute it to a sort of holding cell. I'm not computer savvy so I don't know where they get these robocops. Teeny, tiny police academies?
Anyway, the diverted spam is locked away until it rots, is dumped from the system or becomes a topic on the "Jerry Springer Show."
Couple that with virus detectors and it's a wonder much of anything gets through to a personal file, which is called an inbox. Personally, I would prefer a file called Mr. Jim's Mail, but I don't decide such things.
Over the weekend, two spamlike messages cleared all the hurdles. That brings us back to cigars.
The first item was a news release announcing details of a new online magazine for cigar smokers. It caught my interest. Although I gave up daily indulgence more than a year ago, a high-quality cigar on a special occasion is still enjoyable.
Later that day, a second item came in. It, too, was from CigarWise Magazine (www.cigarwise.com) and noted that its top story in the online issue had been withdrawn.
Believe it or not, it was because of death threats.
Raising the bar
We all know that smoking can be hazardous to our health, but this raised the bar.
The Los Angeles-based magazine's cover story, ''The Internet vs. The Cuban Embargo,'' was an expose detailing the popularity and ease of purchasing Cuban cigars through the Internet. It listed names, places and how-to information.
The story apparently enraged readers who use the Internet to buy U.S.-banned Cuban cigars through a third party. The third party is located in a country that does not ban the import or export of Cuban agricultural goods.
The readers evidently could see their source drying up since federal investigators would presumably see the story and take action.
''Out of security concerns for the author of the expose, and as a courtesy to our readers, we have reluctantly pulled the story from our magazine,'' publisher Vaagn Arakelyan said.
Another story in the magazine highlighted the rising number of women who smoke cigars.
Women and cigars? I see big trouble ahead.
Jim Pettit's column appears Tuesday, Friday and Saturday. He can be reached at pettitj@fayettevillenc.com or 486-3583.
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FReeper Cigar Aficionado |
| "Never mess with a man willing to suck on a raging trash fire." -- Tijeras_Slim Send FReepmail if you want on/off FCAP list |
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i. Las mujeres se parecen a las guitarras, que mientras no las toquen no producen ningún sonido.
'Women are like guitars, when they're not being played/touched they don't produce any sound' (p. 30).
ii. La mujer es como la guitarra: para poder que se caliente, necesita rascarla.
'A woman is like a guitar: in order for her to warm up you have to strum/stroke her' (p.30).
iii. Mujer, escopeta, guitarra y caballo, no prestallo.
'A woman, a shotgun, a guitar, and a horse are not to be lent' (p. 32).
Dude, don't even ask how I find these things (or why.) Now off to find the humidor...
I had been on the fence as to whether to enjoy a cigar today. You just pushed me over to "yes". <|:)~
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