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JD Vance Sweetens Deal By Offering Statue Of Liberty To Greenland
Babylon Bee ^ | 03/30/2025 | Babylon Bee

Posted on 04/01/2025 9:51:57 AM PDT by DFG

GREENLAND — In a bid to sweeten the offer of becoming an American territory, Vice President JD Vance has offered Greenland the Statue of Liberty.

In addition to the Statue of Liberty, Vance announced that the people of Greenland would also receive a copy of a Home Alone 2: Lost In New York laserdisc signed by President Trump, which is reportedly in mint condition.

"It's an incredible offer," said Vance. "Not only do you get to become a part of the greatest country in the world, with the greatest President in history, but you also will get the Statue of Liberty parked right outside the city of... where the heck are we? Nuuk? We'll park it right there. Oh, and did I mention we'll also throw in one coupon for every Greenlander for a free appetizer at Applebee's?"

The Greenlanders were reportedly impressed by the offer, but felt the re-gifted nature of the statue did somewhat diminish how special it was. "It just takes a little bit away from it," said local man Nordviq Lorie. "Though the vast majority of Greenlanders support independent governance, I sure do like those loaded fries at Applebee's. I'll have to think on it."

At publishing time, Vance had even added a miniature statue of chubby JD Vance to the offer.


TOPICS: Humor
KEYWORDS:

1 posted on 04/01/2025 9:51:57 AM PDT by DFG
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To: DFG

... AND this set of Ginsu knives!


2 posted on 04/01/2025 9:53:09 AM PDT by A_perfect_lady (The greatest wealth is to live content with little. -Plato)
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To: DFG

I thought the French Fries sent somebody to pick it up and take it back!


3 posted on 04/01/2025 9:54:18 AM PDT by FlingWingFlyer (It's great that 27 year old Karoline Leavitt has every Democrat on the planet peeing their Depends.)
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To: A_perfect_lady

Throw in a few thousand downtrodden, and it’s a deal. 😸


4 posted on 04/01/2025 9:56:02 AM PDT by alstewartfan (Child slavery, rape and drug OD's mean nothing to Roberts and Barrett. )
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To: alstewartfan

Yeah. They get the downtrodden, we’ll have to take the wretched refuse. It’s a pretty sweet deal.


5 posted on 04/01/2025 10:04:47 AM PDT by Billthedrill
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To: A_perfect_lady

“”AND this set of Ginsu knives!””

LOL

“”BUT WAIT””~~~~~~~We don’t see that ad anymore, do we?


6 posted on 04/01/2025 10:10:59 AM PDT by Thank You Rush ( )
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To: Billthedrill; LS; Travis McGee; marktwain; Ezekiel

I say we keep the Statue.

But let’s melt down that wretched Emma Lazarus Socialist plaque and replace it with a worthy motto.


7 posted on 04/01/2025 10:12:43 AM PDT by The Spirit Of Allegiance (Public Employees: Honor Your Oaths! Defend the Constitution from Enemies--Foreign and Domestic!)
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To: DFG

That got a big hah hah hah....Go BEE!!


8 posted on 04/01/2025 10:34:06 AM PDT by Sacajaweau
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To: All

Nuuk from orbit.


9 posted on 04/01/2025 11:46:58 AM PDT by Peter ODonnell (For two countries with so many lawyers, there ain't much justice in Canada or America (yet))
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To: DFG

10 posted on 04/01/2025 11:50:36 AM PDT by equaviator (If 60 is the new 40 then 35 must be the new 15.)
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To: DFG

We’ll take door number three JD.


11 posted on 04/01/2025 12:03:50 PM PDT by Vaduz
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To: DFG

12 posted on 04/01/2025 2:41:00 PM PDT by Libloather (Why do climate change hoax deniers live in mansions on the beach?)
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To: A_perfect_lady

ABC - Always be closing...if you want the knife set.


13 posted on 04/01/2025 2:44:40 PM PDT by Fledermaus ("It turns out all we really needed was a new President!")
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