Posted on 12/27/2024 1:11:33 PM PST by Red Badger
At first we felt a little sorry for you, Doug. We had naturally assumed you'd been pressed into service by the Democratic Party, that your "marriage" to Kamala Harris—several months before launching her U.S. Senate campaign—was arranged via some internal Craigslist for politically ambitious bachelorettes eager to liberate themselves from the Sugar Daddy lifestyle. When Joe Biden dropped out of the race and you were too busy to take your wife's call because you were "messing around" with your "gay friends" after "SoulCycle class" in West Hollywood, we weren't the least bit surprised. We couldn't have been more wrong.
The Doug Emhoff we have gotten to know over the course of the 2024 presidential campaign is nothing like the effeminate beta-cuck trophy beard we'd long assumed you to be. You weren't a simping "wife guy," after all. You didn't "redefine masculinity," you rekindled it. You embodied it like a man. We'd always wondered why your first marriage failed, and we were happy to learn there was a perfectly reasonable explanation. You were horny, so you banged the nanny. You got her pregnant, of course, because condoms are for cowards. You also hired a "trophy secretary" named Katya at your hotshot law firm, and she was so "talented" it made all your partners jealous. Eventually some angsty feminists complained that Katya was "unqualified" and sued the firm for sex discrimination, but you refused to apologize for being a dude.
America's obnoxious journalists genuinely believed you were one of them—a groveling lib who sits down to pee, a nonbinary girl dad who loves soccer and the WNBA but no actual sports, an effete elite who's never even held a Glock. (We know the gun was yours, bro.) They were sorely mistaken. You revealed yourself to be an old-school Democrat in the mold of Bill Clinton and the Kennedy brothers, someone who understands that chasing tail is just part of the game. The media praised you for "taking a sledgehammer to toxic masculinity," and you repaid them by eviscerating what's left of the #MeToo movement. When a jealous ex-lover accused you of getting a little too handsy (after she disrespected you by flirting with another man), you forced the media to abandon once and for all the preposterous notion that all women deserve to be believed.
Well done, sir. We're glad your wife lost the election, for obvious reasons, but we feel for you nonetheless. What self-respecting man wouldn't want his nagging wife to get a highly regarded six-figure job that gets her out of the house for extended periods of time? We assume you have a backup plan, perhaps a 90-day rehab program in Sedona. Good luck with the intervention. In the meantime, we hope Kamala can take some comfort in the fact that she's married to a Washington Free Beacon Man of the Year (and has slept with two, that we know of). Mazel tov!
Wow, what a nice bit on the second gentleman. You know he’s married to Miss Brain Salad Surgery!
Good ELP album. I bought it when it was new!..............
Bttt.
5.56mm
Me too. I got rid of all my albums a long time ago. But I have plenty of CDs to make up for it, including several of ELP.
Me too. I got rid of all my albums a long time ago. But I have plenty of CDs to make up for it, including several of ELP.
I got to see them on that album tour!.............
It seems strange to me that those two would marry. They aren’t particularly powerful to have a BS marriage like Billary. They aren’t particularly wealthy. They are both open commies. They don’t need “beards” because they both support the gaystapo agenda openly.
Not Michelle?
Yeah. I don't see it either.
I just realized. I have never heard of a tranny being named “man of the year.” We’ve had plenty of men pretending to be women win “woman of the year” stuff .
I suspect the liberal shot callers know men won’t put up with that crap.
27 more days and we won’t have to see this live action Rankin/Bass character anymore!
I been in the right place
But it must have been the wrong time
I’d have said the right thing
But I must have used the wrong line
I’d a took the right road
But I must have took a wrong turn
Would have made the right move
But I made it at the wrong time
I been on the right road
But I must have used the wrong car
My head was in a good place
And I wonder what it’s bad for
Great song!
Free Beacon....what an honor for a wife beater.
Great Earworm. Can’t stop singing it 😆
He deserves a reward just for living with that twit, if for nothing else.
I thought he was in the running for Woman of the Year.
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