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Starmer & Macron Scheme to Attack Russia [semi-satire]
Semi-News/Semi-Satire ^ | 17 November 2024 | John Semmens

Posted on 11/18/2024 9:20:36 AM PST by John Semmens

Alarmed that the election of Donald Trump could lead to a peace agreement between Russia and Ukraine, UK Prime Minister Keir Starmer and French President Emmanuel Macron are pressuring President Biden to approve Zelensky's plan to use Storm Shadow cruise missiles to strike deep into Russian territory.

Starmer lamented, "we were completely stunned by Trump's victory. All the polls suggested the race would be too close to call. Naturally, we expected that the same most extensive voter fraud organization in American history that swept Biden to an easy victory over Trump in 2020 would succeed in sweeping Vice-President Kamala Harris to a similar easy victory. Unfortunately, Trump's boast that his margin would be too big for the race to be rigged against him turned out to be accurate. Our situation is now dire. We have only two months to try to persuade Biden to give Ukraine the weapons they need."

Macron was more optimistic, "we have already persuaded Biden to provide most of the weapons Ukraine has used to keep the war going. I'm confident he will heed our advice, but even if he doesn't Zelensky has all the materials he needs to make enough dirty nuclear bombs to destroy Russia's ability to continue to fight. Once this happens the people of Russia will rise up and overthrow Putin. In the midst of this turmoil French troops can swoop in and gain vengeance for the defeat Russia inflicted on our army in 1812."

A confident Trump called the scheme "foolhardy. England and France are too weak to take on Russia without America's help. I won't help them. My plan is to end the current war, not start a bigger one. I've already met with President Biden and he assured me that he doesn't support further escalation of the war. So, if Starmer and Macron want to start WWIII they'll have to do it without America's help. I hope that knowing this will stop them from doing something incredibly stupid."


TOPICS: Government; History; Humor; Military/Veterans; Politics
KEYWORDS: biden; satire; trump; wwiii

1 posted on 11/18/2024 9:20:36 AM PST by John Semmens
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To: John Semmens

I think I’ll stay out of London and Paris until President Trump takes charge again.


2 posted on 11/18/2024 9:49:34 AM PST by curious7
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To: John Semmens

They’re asking for Kiev to be merged with Chernobyl.


3 posted on 11/18/2024 10:26:08 AM PST by rfp1234 (E Porcibus Unum)
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To: John Semmens

Always the French.

Their alliance with Russia caused WWI, and now their opposition to Russia will cause WWIII.


4 posted on 11/18/2024 10:28:52 AM PST by dfwgator (Endut! Hoch Hech!)
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To: curious7

Boom goes London, boom Paris
More room for you and more room for me


5 posted on 11/18/2024 10:29:47 AM PST by dfwgator (Endut! Hoch Hech!)
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To: John Semmens

seem to recall that the last time France tried to invade Russia it didn’t work out all that well

same, for that matter, when Germany tried it


6 posted on 11/18/2024 12:00:38 PM PST by faithhopecharity ("Politicians aren't born, they're excreted." Marcus Tullius Cicero (106 to 43 BCE))
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