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Harvard Announces Claudine Gay Will Remain As University Führer
The Babylon Bee ^ | 12/13/23

Posted on 12/13/2023 10:31:41 AM PST by cotton1706

CAMBRIDGE, MA — Despite the heavy controversy caused by her responses to questions regarding antisemitism on campus while testifying before Congress, Harvard has confirmed that Claudine Gay will stay on as University Führer.

"We remain steadfastly loyal to our dear leader," the Harvard University board said in a collective statement. "While the last few weeks have been a difficult time, she has inspired all of us to press on toward the goal of creating a great and glorious Harvard, free of any pollution or impurity. Heil Claudine Gay! Harvard Über Alles!"

Gay has fought back against allegations of antisemitism and plagiarism in recent weeks, surviving widespread calls for her firing or resignation. "Nein nein nein nein nein!" Gay shouted while pounding on the podium after being asked if she would resign due to the scandal. "Our university faculty has never been more united than it is this day! We all share in the great struggle to advance our noble cause! We will not be deterred! We will not be defeated! Long live a great and glorious Harvard!"

Despite public outcry, the school's board expressed its unanimous support for Gay. "Never in our school's history have we had such strong leadership," the board's statement said. "With Claudine Gay as Harvard University Führer, we will reach new heights and the greatness of our school has no bounds!"

At publishing time, Gay also announced the creation of a new Sigma Sigma fraternity for students to instill a greater level of pride and passion in the school's students.

(Excerpt) Read more at babylonbee.com ...


TOPICS: Humor
KEYWORDS: claudinegay; dasfuhrer; harvard; harvtard; harvtards; sigmasigma; sigmasigmafraternity; universityfuhrer
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What a glorious headline.
1 posted on 12/13/2023 10:31:41 AM PST by cotton1706
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To: cotton1706

“Sigma Sigma fraternity”

See what they did there?


2 posted on 12/13/2023 10:33:05 AM PST by cotton1706
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To: cotton1706

As they raise their hands and salute: “Meine Fuhrerein!”


3 posted on 12/13/2023 10:36:03 AM PST by ought-six (Multiculturalism is national suicide, and political correctness is the cyanide capsule. )
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Commies only respect power. They won’t back down otherwise.


4 posted on 12/13/2023 10:36:20 AM PST by curious7
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To: cotton1706

I laughed when I read that. Very clever.


5 posted on 12/13/2023 10:36:39 AM PST by ought-six (Multiculturalism is national suicide, and political correctness is the cyanide capsule. )
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To: cotton1706

Good for Harvard! It sounds better in German: “Ein Volk, ein Reich, ein Fuhrer!” I wonder if they’re going to organize university camping trips...


6 posted on 12/13/2023 10:37:48 AM PST by Billthedrill
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To: cotton1706

Everywhere she goes, she should be greeted with a “Sieg Heil!” until she resigns.


7 posted on 12/13/2023 10:38:36 AM PST by Persevero (You cannot comply your way out of tyranny. )
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To: cotton1706

The next Prez wouldn’t have been able to start the day singing

I feel pretty
I feel pretty
I feel pretty and witty and Gay.


8 posted on 12/13/2023 10:39:19 AM PST by frank ballenger (There's a battle outside and it's raging. It'll soon shake your windows and rattle your walls.)
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To: cotton1706

Yesterday Jesse Kelly said she’s accomplishing everything she was hired to do, and she’s doing it splendidly. Her job is to be a female, black university president. Period. It’s not fair to expect anything beyond that.


9 posted on 12/13/2023 10:41:28 AM PST by Spok (It takes a lot of learning to understand how little we know. (Paraphrasing Thomas Sowell.))
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To: cotton1706

LMAO

I love the bee!

President kill the Jews will remain on at Harvard, because we are too scared to fire out affirmative action hire!


10 posted on 12/13/2023 10:42:19 AM PST by TexasFreeper2009
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To: cotton1706

Springtime for Hitler and the Ivy League.


11 posted on 12/13/2023 10:51:48 AM PST by Huskrrrr (Alinsky, you magnificent Bastard, I read your book!)
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To: Spok

I think “Leftist” is also a prerequisite. If she Tweeted in support of Trump, she’d be dumped in the blink of an eye.


12 posted on 12/13/2023 10:54:41 AM PST by rightwingcrazy (;-,)
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To: cotton1706

I C what U did there.


13 posted on 12/13/2023 11:01:15 AM PST by left that other site (Romans 8:28)
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To: cotton1706

14 posted on 12/13/2023 11:14:42 AM PST by Chode (there is no fall back position, there's no rally point, there is no LZ... we're on our own. #FJB)
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To: cotton1706

She’s their most important token Haitian Refugee as long as she’s not pulling an Elizabeth Warren on us (And Them).


15 posted on 12/13/2023 11:15:15 AM PST by FlingWingFlyer (The damage Biden and his freak show is doing to America is not reversable.)
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To: Chode

Doin’ the Humpty Hump!


16 posted on 12/13/2023 11:16:27 AM PST by dfwgator (Endut! Hoch Hech!)
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To: cotton1706

17 posted on 12/13/2023 11:17:09 AM PST by dead (https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=D_vFiUUcBkc)
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To: FlingWingFlyer

NFN not African American FWIW


18 posted on 12/13/2023 11:23:09 AM PST by one guy in new jersey
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To: dfwgator

19 posted on 12/13/2023 11:27:48 AM PST by Chode (there is no fall back position, there's no rally point, there is no LZ... we're on our own. #FJB)
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To: cotton1706

To the furor of all...


20 posted on 12/13/2023 11:30:20 AM PST by null and void (If you support monsters you will die in the cross fire.)
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