Posted on 10/12/2023 6:54:12 AM PDT by DFG
PHOENIX, AZ — After being swept by the Diamondbacks in humiliating fashion, the Los Angeles Dodgers were left wondering if perhaps they ought to have spent more time practicing baseball and less time honoring Satanic nuns dressed in drag.
During the offseason, Dodgers management will be looking at what went wrong in yet another disappointing postseason, and everything will be under the microscope: whether they should have acquired better starting pitching at the trade deadline, why the bats went cold in October, and whether perhaps promoting heretical Satan worship in front of families at Dodger Stadium this year caused the wrath of God to fall upon them.
"Maybe we should have spent more time training our starting pitchers not to give up 4 bombs in an inning and less time honoring Satan," said Manager Dave Roberts in a somber postgame press conference at Chase Field. He shook his head and shrugged. "But that's the benefit of hindsight, I guess."
"What was your approach to this series, and what went wrong?" asked one reporter.
"Yeah, uh, right - our main strategy for the year was to, you know, worship Satan and honor perverted drag queen nuns," Roberts said. "It didn't end up paying off, you know, but we stand by our strategy. As the old saying goes, sometimes you win, sometimes you lose, and sometimes you get swept by the 84-win Diamondbacks after you honor blasphemous drag queens who spit upon the Catholic faith."
"That's just baseball."
You mean the Trans Dodgers , their new name ,LOL
Cursed by God, the team should never win a championship again.
+1
I am done after 45+ years of Dodger fandom. I have fond memories of the ‘77 lineup (Monday, Reggie Smith, Cey, Lopes, Garvey, Hooten), and later great players like Fernando Valenzuela, Pedro Guerrero, Mike Piazza, Orel Hershiser, and Rick Sutcliffe.
That will have to do for one lifetime.
Thanks for the memories, Dodgers of old.
I’m done with MLB. As a baseball fan, I am a widower, and I can never love again.
Satan promised worship me and the world series is yours but then again he’s the father of lies as well.
Weird year. Dodgers out, Orioles out, Braves one game away from eliminating.
The Bees have been working overtime as usual.
Good report on the Dodgers priorities.
When the Dodgers lose, America wins.
It’s like when Jack Bauer says they’re gonna kill you anyway.
They could do a new musical and call it Damn Dodgers!
It’s crazy how baseball playoffs have expanded so much. Teams with records barely above .500 for the regular season, are in the playoffs.
12 out of 30 teams, or 40% of all of major league baseball, are in the playoffs.
And baseball, more than other sports, can see the inferior teams win a short series against superior teams.
It’s all about money.
In the old system where there were no divisions, you knew who was going to be in the World Series, a month beforehand, so everyone lost interest.
Only for one reason, $$$$. It is ridiculous otherwise.
Like you, I miss the baseball of old times.
Seven consecutive ALCS for the Houston Astros. Recognize.
Unfortunately, the lesson they will probably take away is they should have honored the drag queens in October, too.
Go Rangers!
Same here. Threads like this on FR are about my only contact now. Last year I still checked scores and standings occasionally. This year I forgot the playoffs had already started. Zero interest but I suppose I’ll hear what happened at some point. Likely on another future thread here.
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