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Dems Defend Rampaging Teens [semi-satire]
Semi-News/Semi-Satire ^ | 23 April 2023 | John Semmens

Posted on 04/26/2023 12:08:16 PM PDT by John Semmens

Last weekend, mobs of teenagers swarmed into downtown Chicago where they smashed store windows, set cars on fire, assaulted out-of-town tourists, and shot at each other.

Mayor-elect Brandon Johnson (D) pleaded with the city's residents to "not overreact by demonizing the exuberance of our youth. They are our future and should not be condemned for expressing their joy in ways that our older residents might find frightening." He then went on to blame his predecessor for "allowing the pall of systemic racism to stifle opportunities for our black youth."

Outgoing Mayor Lori Lightfoot denied that her reign stifled black youth by pointing out that "gang shootings skyrocketed during my term in office. Whites might not appreciate this lifestyle, but it cannot be said that I presided over a systemic stifling of minority opportunities in our city."

State Senator Robert Peters (D-Chicago) called the destructive behavior "simply a protest against poverty and segregation. When a person is poor it's only natural to want to destroy the property of others. This helps narrow the gap between the 'haves' and the 'have-nots.' The more totally the property is destroyed, the closer to full equality we get. It would be a harder life for everyone, but at least we'd all be equally poor."

If you missed any of the other Semi-News/Semi-Satire posts you can find them at...

https://www.gopbriefingroom.com/index.php/topic,497408.0.html


TOPICS: Government; Humor; Politics
KEYWORDS: chicago; crime; johnson; lightfoot; riots; satire

1 posted on 04/26/2023 12:08:16 PM PDT by John Semmens
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To: John Semmens

They’re not even denying that they are commies anymore!


2 posted on 04/26/2023 12:11:31 PM PDT by No name given (Anonymous is who you’ll know me as.)
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