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Reparations Unanimously Approved [semi-satire]
Semi-News/Semi-Satire ^ | 19 Mar 2023 | John Semmens

Posted on 03/19/2023 9:33:31 AM PDT by John Semmens

The San Francisco Board of Supervisors unanimously approved a measure granting every black resident $5 million in reparations for the slavery and discrimination suffered by blacks living within the current boundaries of the United States since 1619.

Eric McDonnell, chair of San Francisco's African American Reparations Advisory Committee, admitted that "we made no effort to estimate the actual damages to any specific persons or their descendants at the hands of any specific white racists who caused the harm. That task is too daunting. A simpler formula that will be used. To be eligible for the $5 million a person must be at least 18 years old, have identified as Black or African American on public documents for at least 10 years, been born in San Francisco, have proof of residency for at least 13 years, or be a direct descendant of someone incarcerated for drug-related crimes. Liable for paying the $5 million to each beneficiary will be everyone who is not eligible for receiving the benefit."

Stanford University's Hoover Institution estimated the proposal would require families in the city to pay at least $600,000 to cover the cost of reparations awarded. Many may find it difficult to find the funds needed to pay their fair share of the estimated $250 billion needed. Supervisor Rafael Mandelman suggested that "those who own homes could take out a second mortgage or sell their homes to some of the 50,000 new multi-millionaires created by the reparations we just approved. Others without substantial assets could sign multi-generation-family indentured services contracts with individual beneficiaries to work off their share of what is owed."

If you missed any of the other Semi-News/Semi-Satire posts you can find them at...

https://www.gopbriefingroom.com/index.php/topic,494239.0.html


TOPICS: Government; History; Humor; Politics
KEYWORDS: democrats; donatefreerepublic; racism; satire; slavery

1 posted on 03/19/2023 9:33:31 AM PDT by John Semmens
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To: John Semmens
"we made no effort to estimate the actual damages to any specific persons or their descendants at the hands of any specific white racists who caused the harm.

How about the thousands of blacks who owned slaves in the US back then? Do their descendants get reparations, too? How about the blacks who immigrated here?

2 posted on 03/19/2023 9:54:42 AM PDT by TangoLimaSierra (⭐⭐To the Left, The Truth is Right Wing Violence⭐⭐)
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To: TangoLimaSierra
Supervisor Rafael Mandelman suggested that "those who own homes could take out a second mortgage or sell their homes to some of the 50,000 new multi-millionaires created by the reparations we just approved. Others without substantial assets could sign multi-generation-family indentured services contracts with individual beneficiaries to work off their share of what is owed."

John... 100% satire, 50%, or zero?

3 posted on 03/19/2023 2:02:00 PM PDT by Pearls Before Swine
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To: Pearls Before Swine

If it actually happens all that cash will be back in the hands of the white business men and women within a year.


4 posted on 03/19/2023 2:50:46 PM PDT by mosaicwolf
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