Posted on 12/23/2022 1:08:37 PM PST by DFG
KYIV — Somber news came out of war-torn Ukraine today as reports confirmed Santa Claus's sleigh had been mistaken for a hostile Russian aircraft and was shot down by a Ukrainian surface-to-air missile as it flew over the greater Kyiv area early this morning.
It has long been suspected that Santa Claus frequently makes test flights over this region in the days leading up to Christmas, but there have been reports of Ukrainian military personnel being overly eager to try out their new missiles provided by the United States.
"One of our reconnaissance teams observed something unidentifiable on the radar this morning," said Ukrainian military spokesperson Grigor Grigorovic at a media briefing. "We attempted multiple times to communicate with the aircraft and received no response. We very clearly warned the aircraft that we would open fire if it remained in restricted Ukrainian airspace. We did what we had to do. This tragedy is not on us. The blood of Santa Claus is on his own head."
Wreckage believed to be remnants of Santa's sleigh was found in a nearby village, though there has been no sign of Santa himself. The public is holding out hope that he has somehow survived and will still be well enough to carry on his Christmas work over the weekend.
At publishing time, the White House offered no comment on any involvement of the United States in the incident, though the Biden administration was already aware of Ukrainian President Volodymyr Zelensky already requesting another Patriot missile to replace the one used to destroy Santa's sleigh.
They were practicing with the new Patriot Air Defense system we just gave them.
Someone said, I wonder what this button does, boom off goes a missile, down goes Santa.
50 retired and active CIA analysts told CNN it was actually a Russian missile.
Hillary sez 17 intelligence agencies confirmed
This is just a rumor.
The $2,000,000 Patriot missile merely hit and damaged the sleigh flown by the IRS agents assigned to make sure Santa does the paperwork for gifts over $600.
A-ha!!!
“They were practicing with the new Patriot Air Defense system we just gave them.”
That’s the biggest JOKE yet in this war, that Ukrainians will be allowed to operate Patriot Batteries, where the missiles are both very limited in number (for the next 5 years, at least), and the cost per shot is $3M.
Personally, I’m getting to respect the guys who went to Canada, given what our government has become.
He’s too close for missiles!!
Switching to guns!!
The button was probably labeled “do not push.” 😁
They probably figured it can’t be much more difficult to operate than Call of Duty on the Xbox.
They've been training on the Patriot system with the Luftwaffe in Grafenwoehr, Germany.
I saw Rudolph fly by with his red nose flashing. it must have been his last trip.
“ 50 retired and active CIA analysts told CNN it was actually a Russian missile.”
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And any allegations to the contrary are surely RUSSIAN MISINFORMATION!
I would have thought the Taliban would have got him first with all those weapons Biden gave them.
Undoubtedly. 😆😀
If it was the soviets we’d know because it would be deliberate.
What a whole merry clusterfock this is. Didn’t think the beginning of the end of everything would start with ukraine. Suppose most of them didn’t either.
More good news. The IRS agents were captured after they landed the crippled sleigh and the GRU is now interrogating them. The GRU methods are similar to what the IRS uses on taxpayers so this may be a good match. And once they are of no further use, the IRS agents will be getting what they deserve.
It’s about time someone shot down the fat fraud in the red suit that has been lying to children for many generations!!!!
The SOLE reason for the season is Jesus Christ and Him Crucified.
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