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Congress Signs Up For $40 Billion Per Month Ukraine+ Subscription
Babylon Bee ^ | 09/26/2022 | Babylon Bee

Posted on 09/26/2022 1:48:42 PM PDT by DFG

WASHINGTON, D.C. — To avoid fighting over further spending bills, Congress has opted instead to sign up for the brand new subscription service Ukraine+, which only costs $40 billion per month.

"We are proud to be the very first customers for this exciting new service," said Congressman Dan Crenshaw. "Henceforth, $40 billion US dollars will simply be automatically deducted from our account every month, allowing us to continue laundering money and paying off defense lobbyists in perpetuity. Thanks, Ukraine+!"

Experts say subscribing to Ukraine+ is absolutely essential in order to "save democracy or whatever." Studies also confirmed that if anyone disapproves of the new subscription, they are probably a Russian agent and love Putin.

Ukraine+ will not offer any streaming entertainment options, but will give millions of Americans peace of mind knowing their hard-earned tax dollars are going to help Lockheed Martin, Boeing, and Raytheon continue manufacturing weapons to make up for their losses after the Afghanistan withdrawal while preserving the Liberal World Order™.

Representatives for Ukraine+ also confirmed that the other NATO countries will be subscribing, but that their subscription is free.


TOPICS: Humor
KEYWORDS: 10percent4biden; bidenexecutiveorder; congress; nato; putin; russia; subscription; ukraine; zelensky

1 posted on 09/26/2022 1:48:42 PM PDT by DFG
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To: DFG

It could be worse. It could be the Ukraine time share.


2 posted on 09/26/2022 1:51:05 PM PDT by Dr. Sivana (What was 35% of the Rep. Party is now 85%. And it’s too late to turn back—Mac Stipanovich )
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ON THE BACKSTRETCH

3 posted on 09/26/2022 1:53:58 PM PDT by deport
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To: DFG

.
Both Parties said we couldn’t afford the Trump wall @ $25 B

They’ve spent Trillions with Biden!

They don’t even use the word “Debt” with Biden. It’s a Spending orgy.

.


4 posted on 09/26/2022 1:54:04 PM PDT by AnthonySoprano (Statute of Limitations is going to elapse on Hunter Biden )
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To: DFG

It’s too bad Congre$$ is not as liberal spending their own money as they are at spending ours.


5 posted on 09/26/2022 1:54:21 PM PDT by antidemoncrat (.)
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To: DFG
"Your gift of only $1.3 million a day can provide food, shelter, and Javelin missiles for deserving Ukrainian soldiers."


6 posted on 09/26/2022 2:00:10 PM PDT by Yo-Yo (Is the /Sarc tag really necessary? Pray for President Biden: Psalm 109:8)
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To: DFG

It is a GloboHomo Great Reset assistance funding bill.


7 posted on 09/26/2022 2:00:44 PM PDT by MtnClimber (For photos of Colorado scenery and wildlife, click on my screen name for my FR home page.)
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To: AnthonySoprano

Accusations of hypocrisy, double standards, lack of consistency, splinter/log in eye, lack of logic, not occupying moral high ground, willful blindness, projection, never gain any traction when one contends against politically protected individuals and groups.


8 posted on 09/26/2022 2:02:10 PM PDT by one guy in new jersey
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To: DFG

Eyepatch McCain said what!?


9 posted on 09/26/2022 2:02:24 PM PDT by Its All Over Except ...
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To: DFG

Trillions in Iraq.
Trillion in Afghanistan.
Billions a day in Syria.
Billions in Libya.
Tens of billions to Ukraine.

It’s all chump change.

Thank you for participating in the greatest games ever.
Please continue to send your $5, $10, $20, $25, $50 to them Ukrainian NGOs to fund ZelenskyyIdiots bank accounts, etc. There are no needy Vets or homeless Vets, or the like here in America that should be getting that money....

Move along now.


10 posted on 09/26/2022 2:09:49 PM PDT by cranked
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To: Its All Over Except ...

LOL. I’m glad they mentioned that turncoat by name in this ‘article’.


11 posted on 09/26/2022 2:12:16 PM PDT by dougherty (I saw the angel in the marble and carved until I set him free. - Michelangelo)
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To: DFG

I recently read that shortly after the end or WW2, half of the world’s wealth was concentrated in the US, but now, only 25% of it is.

“A fool and his money are soon parted”


12 posted on 09/26/2022 2:13:38 PM PDT by Golden Eagle ( What's in YOUR injection? )
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To: DFG

It’s like a Microsoft office 365 subscription, just more expensive.


13 posted on 09/26/2022 2:15:58 PM PDT by Flick Lives (FJB and the corrupt FBI)
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To: cranked

Neocon Freepers want MORE.


14 posted on 09/26/2022 2:16:02 PM PDT by Its All Over Except ...
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To: DFG

Whew ... thank goodness it’s BB; however, just reading the headline made my BP go up (No joke). The Congress Critters ARE dumb enough to do this & POTATUS FJB would certainly think it’s a great idea.


15 posted on 09/26/2022 2:19:40 PM PDT by Qiviut (The unvaccinated, the chosen of the invisible ark .... (author unknown))
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To: DFG

“ save democracy or whatever.”

AKA Blank Checks for unaccountable giveaways idiots will sign on to


16 posted on 09/26/2022 2:22:33 PM PDT by NWFree (Somebody has to say it 🤪)
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To: Golden Eagle

So you are saying that the US has given away a half of its wealth?

You do know how wealth is created right?


17 posted on 09/26/2022 3:15:03 PM PDT by FreshPrince
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To: DFG

Darn, the Bee’s headlines are believable now.


18 posted on 09/26/2022 3:27:33 PM PDT by Irish Eyes
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To: Yo-Yo

I was going to change the channel until they played a Sarah McLachlan song and showed me sad Ukrainians without so much as a bazooka.


19 posted on 09/26/2022 4:23:20 PM PDT by KarlInOhio (The government sees you as either livestock or pet. If things get bad they will eat their pets too.)
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To: DFG
this is so perfect

thanks for posting

20 posted on 09/26/2022 6:30:51 PM PDT by SisterK (the final variant is communism)
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