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Omicron Panic [semi-satire]
Semi-News/Semi-Satire ^ | 19 December 2021 | John Semmens

Posted on 12/18/2021 7:39:25 AM PST by John Semmens

The emergence of the more contagious, but milder Omicron variant of the covid virus has created a wave of apprehension in covid policy-making circles.

Dr. Anthony Fauci lamented "to the untrained person, Omicron is indistinguishable from an ordinary cold. This will greatly complicate our ability to achieve the goal of 100% vaccination. We're already losing credibility with all the breakthrough covid infections we're seeing. Right now, there are fears that the vaccines may be making things worse, but it's the only strategy we have. What dire message can we convey that will encourage the vaccine resisters to take the jab?"

As is worthy of a great leader, President Biden wasted no time in concocting a dire message by predicting "a winter of severe illness and death if more people don't get vaccinated. I ordered everyone to get vaccinated just a few months ago. That some are still disobeying me is unforgivable disloyalty, maybe even treason. It's all so senseless. If you're vaccinated you can't get sick or infect others. As for the complaint that I'm infringing on personal freedom, well, not too long ago a great actor and former governor said 'screw your freedom. Get vaccinated.' I wouldn't have used those words, but I agree with the sentiment. I say, be a patriot and get vaccinated."

The seriousness of the threat from Omicron was illustrated this week when 100 NFL players tested positive for covid and had to be quarantined for two weeks. All but one of these players was already vaccinated. In fact, during the two years that the pandemic has been with us not a single NFL player has died or become seriously ill with covid. Commissioner Roger Goodell attributed the health of the league's players to "our rigorous vaccination program. To meet the danger of Omicron we are ordering all players get booster shots before the end of the year." Whether vaccinations merit such faith is cast into doubt by the fact that no players died or became seriously ill with covid during 2020 when no vaccines were available.

In related news, National Institute of Health Director Francis Collins boasted about his bravery during the Trump Administration. "If I had listened to Trump and approved the use of hydroxychloroquine for treating covid we would never have been able to issue the emergency use authority for the covid vaccines because we can't give an EUA if there's an approved treatment available. I know some doctors seem to have successfully used hydroxychloroquine to help people recover from the disease, but the inability to give the EUA for the Pfizer, Moderna, and Johnson & Johnson vaccines would have cost these great companies billions in profit."

If you missed any of the other Semi-News/Semi-Satire posts you can find them at...

https://www.gopbriefingroom.com/index.php?topic=456321.0


TOPICS: Business/Economy; Government; Health/Medicine; Humor; Politics; Sports
KEYWORDS: anthonyfauci; biden; collins; covid; covidstooges; fauci; goodell; nfl; obamacare; satire; trump; vaccinemandates; vaccines

1 posted on 12/18/2021 7:39:25 AM PST by John Semmens
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To: John Semmens

Apparently this guy and his tools wouldn’t recognize a duck if it walked up to them and quacked.

If it looks, feels, and has the impact of a common cold, it is.

This is now like the morons who sold the same crappola as Web2.0, and the idiots who bought into it.


2 posted on 12/18/2021 7:57:31 AM PST by bobbo666 (Baizuo, WuhanFlu)
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To: bobbo666

Omicron Godzilla! Omicron Godzilla! Quack Quack...


3 posted on 12/18/2021 8:17:40 AM PST by GaltAdonis
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To: bobbo666

Omicron Godzilla! Omicron Godzilla! Quack Quack...


4 posted on 12/18/2021 8:27:04 AM PST by GaltAdonis
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